Timeless 17
by jakesgirl1001
Summary: Part 17 of the 18 part timeless story of Jake and Sam
1. Chapter 1

**TIMELESS 17**

**Chapter 1**

Jake looked out the window of the plane, his wife snuggled into his chest as she sat next to him dozing. They had caught the early flight out of Hawaii and were flying back to San Francisco.

His having Sam as his wife did seem like a dream to him. A pleasant dream for sure, but a week ago he was supposed to marry someone else.

He had loved Dawn, and he now thought of that love in the past tense. Jake had never loved Dawn the way he loved the woman who was now in his arms.

The love he felt for Sam, his wife, was so intense it was overwhelming at times. This was why he had been so devastated when he had thought she had cheated on him.

Jake shivered, remembering that time. He had never felt such pain as he did then. It had felt as if someone had ripped his heart out and in a way, that's exactly what had happened.

He had been in such agony, such pain he wasn't sure he'd ever recover. Then he had met Dawn.

Jake smiled softly remembering the woman he had almost married. She had ended their engagement two days before they were to be married. Jake had just learned that Sam hadn't cheated on him after all, being drugged and date raped instead. He had planned to still marry Dawn even after hearing the truth about what had happened with Sam.

He had loved Dawn and had thought his future was with her. Jake had felt that Sam was in his past and while he had forgiven her for what had happened, he planned on marrying Dawn. Sam had been out of his life for a couple of years.

What a joke that was.

Once Dawn had broken it off, all Jake could think of was Samantha. He had gone back to Hawaii with Kit and Cricket, intent on seeing Sam. When he had seen her he realized how much he had missed her in his life. He also realized that he still loved her.

He not only loved her, he was still crazy about her. One glance at her had made him recognize that fact. Sam had taken one look at him, thinking he was on his honeymoon with Dawn, and ended up getting hurt as she tried to get away.

Jake had stayed with her overnight at the hospital, the two of them talking and clearing the misunderstandings between them. By the end of the night, they realized how much they still cared about each other.

Loving Jake hadn't been a problem for Sam. She had never stopped loving him. One thing had led to another and the two of them had gotten married yesterday.

Now they were heading to California where they would pick up Sam's things and then start driving back to Nevada where they would pick up Jake's truck in Reno. Then they would head back to Darton County. Sam hadn't been home for years, since she and Jake had broken up.

Sam was worried that Jake's family would resent her even though he assured her that they knew she hadn't betrayed them. Jake was sure that Kit had notified his family that he and Sam were married.

Sam stirred in his arms. Jake kissed the top of her head where she had received stitches from hitting her head when she had seen him in Hawaii for the first time. She reached up in her sleep to itch her head.

Jake chuckled and took her hand away, not wanting her to scratch out her stitches.

"Would you like anything?" one of the flight attendants asked him as she went by.

"No, thank you," Jake shook his head.

_I've got all I need._

He tightened his arm around his wife.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Sam felt the difference in the plane as it began its decent into San Francisco. She stirred, opening her eyes. She stared into the dark brown eyes looking down at her.

"Have I slept the whole flight?" Sam asked with a yawn.

"Just about," Jake confirmed.

"I'm sorry," Sam murmured, reaching up to kiss his mouth.

"Don't be," Jake kissed her. "I kinda like holding my wife while she sleeps."

"I'm your wife?" Sam teased.

"Yep and don't you forget it," Jake teased her back.

"I won't," Sam told her. "I have the bruises on my backside from falling off the wedding table."

Jake's mouth twitched. "I'll kiss them later."

"You'll kiss my…," Sam looked surprised.

"Brat, I believe I've already kissed it," Jake's eyes were dancing.

Sam blushed. Jake's mouth twitched. Sam swatted him and the two of them shared a smile.

"How are you feeling?" Jake asked.

"I'm tired obviously," Sam answered. "I'm a bit crampy but not too bad."

"Your head?"

"Okay," Sam assured him. "My stitches itch."

"You knew they would," Jake said.

Sam nodded, her hand unconsciously going up to itch the top of her head. Jake took her hand away, turning it and kissing her palm. He felt Sam shiver.

"How long will it take to pack up your things?" Jake wondered.

"Not long," Sam responded. "I don't have much."

That statement made Jake sad.

"What about your job?" Jake asked.

"I do have to go in and talk to Johnny," Sam said. "I owe him my resignation in person."

"I'm sorry, Brat," Jake murmured.

"Don't be," Sam put a finger against his full lips. "When we…before, we talked about my maybe getting a job in Darton. It's enough."

Jake gave her a look like he didn't believe her.

"Jake, it's enough," Sam insisted. "All I ever wanted was to be your wife and the mother of your children. If I work for a paper, it's just a plus."

Jake kissed her forehead. Sam shut her eyes feeling his lips against her forehead and sighed. She had spoken the truth.

"I love you, sweetheart," Jake said softly.

"I adore you, husband," Sam responded.

"Can you leave by tomorrow morning?" Jake asked.

"I'm not sure," Sam admitted. "For sure the next morning."

Jake turned back to looking out the window and Sam waited him out. She knew he was thinking of roundup. He really needed to be there.

"Can you call Three Ponies and have it postponed a day?" Sam wondered.

Jake turned back to her, a soft smile on his face.

"I was just thinking of doing just that," he told her.

"Or you could fly into Reno from San Francisco and I'll join you later," Sam suggested.

She saw instantly he didn't like that suggestion.

"No," Jake shook his head.

"Why not?"

"We've been apart for way too long, Brat," Jake's voice was gruff. "I'm not leaving you to join me later. Either we go home together or we don't go."

Sam looked away. Jake had seen the concern in her face before she turned away.

"Tell me," Jake urged.

Sam sighed.

"I don't have a home besides my apartment in San Francisco," Sam told him.

His fingers took her chin and made her look at him.

"You have my home," Jake informed her. "Brat, you have a home at Three Ponies."

"What happened to our house?" Sam had to ask.

She saw the flash of pain in his eyes.

"Bryan and Cara are living there," Jake said, his voice so low she had to strain to hear him.

He saw the pain in Sam's eyes.

"We'll build a new home," Jake shrugged. "That one wasn't meant to be ours. We'll have a new home."

"That could take awhile," Sam pointed out.

"So we live in my room," Jake shrugged again.

"What if I get pregnant?" Sam wondered.

"Then we live in my room and Quinn's," Jake laughed. "Brat, it will be fine."

Sam nodded, sighing again.

They felt the plane start downward as it headed into the airport to land. Sam trusted Jake and wanted to be with him, but she was also a bit apprehensive about moving back to Darton County.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Jake looked around Sam's apartment. She had been right. She didn't have much. It made his heart ache to see how little she had lived with.

He saw the pictures on the wall and moved towards them. Most of them were of him. Some were of the two of them including the picture of them where Sam was riding piggy back, Jake smiling at her over his shoulder. It was the same picture Dawn had seen of them when she had first come to Three Ponies.

"I cried many times over that picture," Sam's voice startled him. "I almost threw it out a couple of times."

"Yeah," Jake understood, remembering that his first reaction upon seeing in the sunporch was to throw it against the wall.

He put his arm around her now. It didn't cause him pain anymore. Just over the years that they had been apart.

Sam buried her face into him and he put his other arm around her.

"Shhh," Jake soothed her, his large hands rubbing her back. "It's over now, Brat."

Sam nodded quickly against him, knowing the truth in his words but still sad at how much they had missed. Or rather _she _had missed. Jake had had Dawn while Sam couldn't love anyone but him. Hadn't wanted to love anyone but Jake.

He put her away from him so he look see her face. She lifted her face to his for his kiss.

"I'm not sure we should stay here tonight," Jake told her.

"Why?" Sam wondered.

"You have a twin bed," he pointed out.

"I told you I didn't have much," Sam reminded him.

"Sure, but you didn't tell me you had a shrimp bed," Jake's eyes were lively.

"I'm a shrimp remember?" Sam laughed.

"Yes, I remember," Jake chuckled.

"What do you want to do?" Sam asked.

"Not much we can do," Jake shrugged. "Either stay here or get a hotel room with a normal sized bed."

"We could stay with my aunt," Sam suggested with a grin. "Her spare bedroom has a double bed."

"Still not big enough," Jake shook his head. "We need at least a queen, preferably a king."

Sam sighed, remembering they had planned on getting a king sized bed when they had planned on getting married before.

"Stop," Jake's arm tightened on her. "We'll do everything right this time."

Sam only nodded.

"We can always try sleeping in the shrimp bed," Jake raised an eyebrow at him. "'Course something tells me we wouldn't get much sleep having to sleep on top of each other, but that's not so bad."

Sam started to laugh then. "We are newlyweds after all."

"That we are," Jake agreed, wrapping her in his arms and falling on the bed.

Sam squealed as she landed on his chest.

"See? We fit just fine," Sam told him, her lips meeting his.

They quickly shed their clothes before coming back together.

Afterwards, Sam's hands played in his black Shoshone hair, loving the feel of it through her fingers.

"I guess my twin bed wasn't so bad, huh?" Sam teased.

Jake chuckled. No, the bed hadn't been so bad after all.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Jake waited for Sam as she cleaned out her desk at the _Chronicle_. Sam had cried when she had given her notice to Johnny. Jake thought it looked like Johnny was about to cry also.

Jake gave Johnny credit. He didn't try and talk Sam out of leaving. He had taken one look at his favorite reporter's face and simply nodded.

Now, Johnny sidled up to Jake and Jake looked at the other man expectantly.

"I wasn't sure when she called me from Hawaii, but you're good for her," Johnny murmured. "I could see the difference immediately. She was in a bad way for a long time."

Jake nodded. Everything he had heard had told him how bad she actually was. First Kit, then Sam and now Johnny had all said the same thing.

"She had given up, basically," Johnny went on. "I tried to keep her going with stories and assignments but I'm not sure how long I could have done it. She faded away a little more each day."

"She won't anymore," Jake promised quietly.

"I can see that," Johnny said. "I was afraid she would take her own life at one point."

Jake shuddered knowing that Sam had tried a couple of times.

Johnny stuck out his hand to Jake. Jake didn't hesitate in shaking the other man's hand. "She's a great reporter, but she needed more than that."

"She has it," Jake responded.

"Yes, she finally does," Johnny nodded, glancing towards Sam.

She had finished putting everything in a box, slinging her pink _My Little Pony_ backpack over her shoulder. Jake grinned at the backpack as he stepped forward to take the box.

"Here, let me," he told her.

"Thanks," Sam smiled at him.

"You're sure you want to do this Forster?" Johnny asked, though he was smiling at her.

"Yes," Sam nodded.

"I'll mail you your Pulitzer," Johnny said.

"If I win," Sam laughed.

"Something tells me you will," Johnny responded. "I have a good feeling about this." He looked at Jake standing nearby, Sam's box in his hands. "A good feeling about all of this."

"Bye Johnny," Sam gave her editor a hug.

Jake watched as the other man hugged his wife, but he didn't feel threatened by it. He trusted Sam completely.

Jake caught himself. He had quickly gone from not trusting her, thinking she had betrayed him, to trusting her so thoroughly again. He loved her with his soul. The soul that Dawn had helped heal and for that he would always be grateful.

"Goodbye Sam," Johnny returned her hug. "You know you'll always have a job with me if you need it."

"I know," Sam smiled. "I appreciate all you've done for me."

"Can it, Forster," Johnny told her with a smile. "You put me on the map with your stories."

"Then you owe me," Sam swatted his arm.

Johnny met Jake's eyes. The two men nodded at each other. Johnny was asking Jake to take care of Sam and Jake was letting the other man know he would. Jake was thanking Johnny for keeping Sam alive while they had been apart.

Sam waved as she and Jake left the office to wait by the elevators.

"Are you sad?" Jake had to ask.

Sam shook her head, smiling up at him. She tucked her arm through his as he held her box.

"No, I want to be with you," Sam told him. "I'm your wife. This place was here when I needed…" Sam's voice broke.

Jake shifted the box to one hand and put his other arm around the woman who was his wife.

"That part is over," Jake murmured, kissing the top of her head.

"When I needed to run, it was here," Sam managed to get out.

"You don't need to run anymore," Jake said.

Sam shook her head. No, her running was over. Now she was married to the man she loved. The man she had loved since she was four years old.

"I love you," they both said at the same time, smiling softly at the other.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

Jake was driving Sam's mustang as they pulled out of San Francisco early the next morning. Sam took her camera out of her pink backpack, ignoring Jake's grin, and pointed it towards the city as they left. She snapped a couple of pictures, then put down the camera and watched as the city faded in the distance.

"No, looking back, Brat," Jake told her.

Sam sighed and turned to the front. "I'm not. Not really." She put her camera back in the _My Little Pony_ backpack.

Jake glanced at her, relaxing when he saw that she didn't have that haunted look on her face and in her eyes anymore. He glanced away quickly as he felt the emotion of seeing her so afraid and haunted at Cricket's store.

Sam looked over at him as he drove. They had about a three and a half hour trip.

"Do you want me to drive some?" Sam asked.

"Nah, this is nothin'," Jake assured her. "I drove back and forth from Elko all the time."

"Five hours," Sam murmured.

Jake put one hand on the console between them, palm up. Sam grasped it with one of hers and smiled when Jake gave it a squeeze.

"I love you," Jake told her.

"I know and I love you too," Sam answered.

"Listen, we need to talk," Jake glanced over at her. He saw her frown.

"What about," Sam tried to calm her thudding heart.

"Don't look like that," Jake said. "It's nothing bad, I promise."

Their eyes met briefly and Jake let her see him. Slowly, Sam nodded her head trusting him.

"It's about a ring for you," Jake went on.

"You don't have to get me one," Sam told him.

"Yes, I do," Jake countered. "You're my wife. I don't want other guys moving in on you and a ring will help that." He grinned at her, teasing.

Sam looked like she had been slapped. She bit her lip and turned away. She had worn his ring before and it didn't stop Creep from moving in on her and raping her.

"What?" Jake pulled on her hand when she tried to tug it away from his.

"It didn't work before," Sam's voice was full of emotion. "He still came after me."

Well darn! If he hadn't been holding Sam's hand, Jake would have either rubbed the back of his neck or slapped himself across the face for being stupid.

"I'm sorry," Jake told her.

Sam shook her head, looking down at her lap. "It's still hard for me."

"Of course, it is," Jake said. "Brat, you were raped. Have you talked to anyone about it?"

"Jen," Sam shrugged.

"Someone with professional training?" Jake asked.

"No," Sam shook her head again. She took a deep breath and let it out.

"Anyway, I don't need a ring," Sam went back to their previous conversation.

"I still have the other," Jake confessed.

Sam's head snapped around so quickly her ponytail swung away from her head.

"You still have my ring?" she couldn't help but yelp.

Jake nodded, glancing at her, trying to gauge her reaction.

"I would have thought you'd thrown it out a long time ago," Sam mused, staring out the windshield without really seeing anything.

"I tried," Jake was honest, causing Sam to look at him again.

She bit her lip before turning away again.

"I was going to make a couple of necklaces for my nieces, but I never did," Jake said.

Sam felt her eyes tearing up and tried to blink them away. She had hurt him so badly that he wanted to throw out her ring.

"It's yours if you want it," Jake went on, seeing the grief on her face. "Or I can buy you something else."

"Will it bring back bad memories for you?" Sam asked.

"Not if I see it again on your finger," Jake told her honestly. "Brat, you're my wife. You didn't do anything wrong. It's just a ring."

"I loved my ring," Sam confessed. "It killed me to send it back. It made everything so final."

"Yes, it did," Jake nodded. "When Mom called me at school to tell me it had arrived, I had a hard time with it. Then when I saw the box on my dresser…" It was Jake's turn to be emotional.

Sam's tears spilt over her eyelids to trickle down her cheeks.

"Don't, Brat," Jake squeezed her hand again.

"I wanted to die for hurting you the way I did," Sam sniffled.

"It's over now," Jake said. "We're together again and married."

Sam sniffled and nodded, glancing over at him with a smile.

"I'd love to have my ring back if you're sure it won't give you bad memories," Sam told him.

"I'll give it to you when we get home," Jake promised.

"Home," Sam murmured. "I haven't had a home in so long."

"You do now," Jake said. "Mine."


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

Sam stood looking at Jake's truck. It was so foreign to her. She felt as if part of her was missing, not seeing the navy Avalanche that was so much a part of him. A part of them. She had liked driving the rental around Hawaii, the two of them, once they were back together. It had made her feel like they were truly together again.

Now, the black truck only served to remind Sam of what had happened between the two of them. They had broken up and because he couldn't stand to think of her, he had dumped his other truck for this one. This truck that Dawn had ridden in. Did this truck symbolize Dawn to him as the Avalanche had symbolized her?

Sam hadn't said any of this to him, dutifully following him to Adam's house in Reno. She had felt strange standing on Adam's porch while Jake knocked on the door.

"Oh Sammy," Adam put his arms around the woman he'd always considered his little sister when he answered the door.

Adam met Jake's eyes over Sam's head as Sam started to weep. He could see how relaxed Jake was now. He hadn't really seen it since Jake had thought that Sam had betrayed him.

Adam rubbed Sam's back, comforting her.

"It's good to have you back, Sammy," Adam told her. He made to kiss the top of her head and saw the stitches. "What happened to your head?" He looked again at Jake.

"She fell in Cricket's store and got hit in the head by some cans," Jake told his brother.

"Are you okay, Sammy?" Adam asked, putting her away from him and looking down at her.

"I am now," Sam told him, wiping her eyes. "I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about it, Sammy," Adam smiled at her. "You look good."

"I'm a mess, but thanks for lying," Sam responded.

Jake and Adam snorted.

"I think you look wonderful," Sherri moved in to hug and kiss her new sister-in-law. She was very pregnant and had to turn her belly to the side in order to hug Sam.

"Look at you," Sam smiled at Sherri.

"Expecting a boy this time," Sherri rubbed her belly.

"Don't tell Mom," Adam said. "We've told everyone we don't know yet."

"We won't," Jake told him. "Congratulations."

"We're going to name him Sean," Sherri smiled at Adam.

A dark little girl toddled in and grabbed onto Sherri's leg. She looked up at Sam, not sure who she was.

"This is Caitlin," Sherri brought her daughter forward.

Sam crouched down to get on Caitlin's level. "Hi Caitlin, I'm Sam."

"Hi," Caitlin said, trying to get behind her mother's leg again.

"She's your Uncle Jake's wife," Adam explained.

"Uncwle Jwake," Caitlin smiled at her uncle.

Jake bent down and opened his arms to his niece. She didn't hesitate to go into his arms as Jake picked her up.

Sam couldn't help the smile seeing her husband interact with his niece. Her hair was a shade or two lighter than Jake's along with her skin tone. She was a beautiful little girl and Sam could see where a daughter of hers and Jake's would look similar.

"How long are you two staying?" Adam asked.

Jake looked at Sam.

"Not long," Jake answered. "I'd like to get home tonight."

"Does Mom know you're back?" Adam wondered.

"Not yet," Jake shook his head, glancing again at his wife.

"I can go to River Bend tomorrow," Sam told him.

Jake nodded. "I need to talk to Dad and see when they're starting roundup too."

It was Adam's turn to nod.

"You'll be the only Ely woman on roundup," Jake informed her. "They're all pregnant."

"Not that they go anyway," Sherri grinned.

"No," Jake grinned, shaking his head.

"Do you want me to stay home?" Sam asked.

"No," Jake put Caitlin down when she started to wiggle. He then put his arm around Sam. "I want you with me."

Sherri and Adam saw his eyes soften as he looked at his new wife. Their eyes met, smiling softly at each other. Both were pleased to see Jake and Sam together again and happy.

"Okay," Sam leaned into him. "I doubt Gram's got enough tents."

"So?" Jake shrugged. "You've camped out with us before."

Sam nodded, but couldn't help but wonder if Dawn went on roundup with Jake. She stiffened in his arms and he felt it.

Adam saw something pass over Sam's face. His eyes flicked to Jake's and he saw Jake had noticed it.

"You're welcome to spend the night," Adam told them, glancing at Sherri for affirmation. Sherri nodded.

"Why don't you?" Sherri encouraged. "You'll not arrive at Three Ponies so late that way. You can leave first thing in the morning."

Sam wasn't sure, but didn't say anything. She looked up at Jake in question.

"Let me call Dad," Jake said. "See when they're starting roundup."

Jake stepped away from them and went outside.

"How about an iced tea, Sammy," Adam offered her.

"Sure Adam, thanks," Sam smiled at her big brother.

"Let's sit," Sherri started for the furniture. Sam trailed after her after looking to where Jake had disappeared.

Jake came into the house a few minutes later, finding everyone already sitting down. He smiled as he spied Sam, feeling the joy of having her in his life again wash over him.

"Dad says day after tomorrow," Jake announced as he sat down next to her, putting an arm around her shoulder. "So if you want to stay, we can."

Sam's eyes questioned his. Jake thought he saw a tiredness in Sam's face.

"Let's stay, okay?" he said.

"Yes, please stay," Sherri put in, seeing the hesitation in Sam's eyes.

Sam and Jake talked through their eyes. He told her he thought she looked tired. She admitted that she was. She was afraid too. He calmed her fears.

Sherri met Adam's eyes. He grinned at her. Adam was used to seeing Jake and Sam communicate this way, though it had been awhile.

"Okay," Sam nodded, still looking at Jake. Then her eyes flicked to Sherri and Adam. "Thank you."

Sherri tried to get up so she could make sure the guest room was clean for them. Adam helped her up and smiled as she waddled towards the room. Sam and Jake also stood up.

"Thank you Adam," Sam murmured, bringing Adam's eyes back to her.

Adam put his arm around her shoulder. "No Sammy," he whispered to her. "Thank you for still loving Jake and marrying him."

"Not a problem," Sam grinned at him, glancing back at Jake who told her how much he loved her with his dark brown eyes.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

"Did you tell them I was with you?" Sam asked Jake when they were alone. They had just gotten ready for bed and were laying together in the dark.

"They knew," Jake responded. "Kit had called home."

Sam didn't ask, but Jake knew she wondered.

"They're happy for us," Jake assured her.

Still Sam didn't say anything.

"Yes, Dawn went on roundup once with me," Jake murmured.

Sam started. She should be used to it, but he still surprised her sometimes.

"I don't know why that bothers me," Sam confessed.

Jake tightened his arms on her.

"You're my wife," Jake reminded her.

"She would have been," Sam reminded him.

"But she's not," Jake said. "You are."

Jake gave a sigh.

"Brat, you're the one I married," Jake told her. "I would have married Dawn had she not called it off, but she did. Not that I necessarily believe in divine intervention, but something made her go from wanting to marry me to breaking it off."

Sam nodded, knowing that was a lot for Jake to say.

"I suppose I owe her a thank you, huh?" she smiled against the skin of his chest.

"Not sure if you do, but I do," Jake smiled in the darkness.

Sam rolled onto him then, their mouths finding the others'. Their tongues tangled as they kissed. She felt his large hands stroking her back all the while kissing her.

She wrapped her arms around him, one hand playing through his thick black hair afterwards.

"I love you," Sam whispered into the night.

She felt his hand trace down her jaw. Sam felt absolute peace.

"Thank you both," Sam hugged first Sherri then Adam in the morning.

"Any time, Sammy," Adam said into her hair as he hugged her back. "Any time at all." Sam looked at the man who used to braid her hair for her when she was too little to do it herself. She felt the tears welling up in her eyes.

"Shhh," Adam murmured to her as he hugged her closer. "He never loved her the way he loves you. Remember that. They'll know it too when they see the two of you together again."

Sam nodded, unable to speak.

Jake watched his wife and his brother wondering what Adam had told her. He saw the tears on Sam's face.

"I love you, Adam," Sam gave him a quick kiss.

"Love you too, little sis," Adam kissed her nose causing Sam to giggle. She quickly wiped her tears.

"Bye Caitlin," Sam smiled at Adam's little daughter.

"Say goodbye to Aunt Sam," Sherri urged her daughter.

Sam's eyes flew to Jake's who was smiling softly at her. She was an aunt now. To a whole bunch of Ely cousins.

"You'll be overwhelmed when we get to Three Ponies," he promised, knowing exactly what she was thinking.

"Bwye Aunt Swam," Caitlin said and Sam stooped down to hug her new niece.

"Bye honey," Sam said into her dark hair. She felt Caitlin's small arms go around her briefly.

"Bwye Uncle Jwake," Caitlin giggled, holding her arms out to him. Everyone smiled as Jake lifted her up for a hug. Caitlin put her arms around his neck as he gave her a kiss.

He put her down, then took Sam's hand, the two of them waving again as they started towards their vehicles. Jake opened the door of her mustang.

"I'll follow you," Jake told her. "Be careful and call me if you need to stop or have problems, okay?"

"Wouldn't it be better if I followed you?" Sam asked.

Jake shook his head. He didn't tell her that he was concerned she'd chicken out and end up turning around and disappearing on him. It would kill him if she did, so he'd much rather have her in front of him so he could keep an eye on her.

"Okay," Sam nodded.

They kissed briefly, smiling at each other.

"I love you," they both said together, laughing softly afterwards.

Jake shut her door and then got into his black truck. They had another two hours before they would reach Three Ponies.

He did a lot of thinking during those two hours. As they got closer to home, he made a few decisions. They were decisions for him, not anything he needed to discuss with Sam.

Jake remembered the frenzy of leaving Three Ponies last week to go after her. Dawn had just broken off the wedding and he had been sad, but not devastated. Then Sam had invaded his brain and he realized how much he had still loved her.

What a difference a week made sometimes. He watched the back of her car as they neared Darton, anxious to be home with her for good.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

When they were about an hour out of Darton, Sam picked up her phone and dialed a phone number. She glanced in the rear view mirror, smiling as she saw Jake behind her. She listened to the ringing before it was picked up.

"Hey," Sam said into her phone.

"Sam!" Jen yelped. "I've left messages."

"I shut my phone off for a few days," Sam told her.

"What happened?" Jen asked.

"I'm about an hour out of Darton," Sam responded.

"Oh you are not," Jen scoffed.

"Oh yes I am," Sam laughed. "And a married woman."

"What?" Jen screamed.

Sam held the phone away from her ear.

"Did you marry Jake?" Jen wondered.

"Well I would have married Kit to stay in Hawaii, but Cricket wouldn't let me," Sam giggled.

"Oh my gosh," Jen was stunned. "You did it, you really did it."

"Yeah," Sam sighed. "I love him a lot, Jen. I never stopped."

"I know," Jen murmured. "I am happy for you. You deserve better than Ely, but I know you love him."

Jen laughed and Sam laughed with her.

"How's Eric?" Sam asked.

"He's good," Jen responded. "You're coming home and I'm flying out to spend time with him in California."

"Figures," Sam sighed. "For how long?"

"A couple of weeks," Jen told her.

"Good for you," Sam said. "We might be cousins-in-law someday, huh?"

"Looks like it," Jen replied. "Of course, best friends come before cousins-in-law."

"Yep it does," Sam agreed.

She glanced in the rearview mirror again and had to smile at seeing Jake still there.

"Are you going on roundup?" Jen asked.

"Yes," Sam nodded even though Jen couldn't see her.

"Be careful," Jen warned. "You haven't ridden regularly in a couple of years."

"Regularly?" Sam barked out a laugh. "Try never. Nada. None."

"Your butt and legs are gonna be sore," Jen predicted.

"No kidding," Sam groaned.

"You sound better," Jen told her. "I might not like Jake, but you sound better."

"I am better, Jen," Sam assured her. "I feel alive again."

"I have to tell you, I was worried," Jen said. "You looked like death warmed over and you didn't care that you did."

"No, I didn't," Sam sighed. "I have a lot to tell you when we get together."

"Bad?" Jen wondered.

"Yeah, pretty bad," Sam responded. "I was in bad shape, Jen."

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to," Jen told her.

"I think I do," Sam said.

"You have an hour," Jen pointed out. "Wanna tell me now?"

"It's an awful lot," Sam warned her.

"Go ahead," Jen responded. "I'm sitting down. I've got the time if you want to tell me."

And so Sam did. Everything. How close she had been to killing herself. How she had wanted to die the day that Jake was supposed to marry Dawn.

On her end, Jen put her hand over her mouth, trying to keep the sounds inside as her best friend told her just how despondent she had been. Jen knew it had been bad, but she had no idea just how bad it was.

Jen decided then and there that she would be grateful to Jake Ely for the rest of her life. Unknowingly he had rescued Jen's best friend, bringing her back from the brink of death.

Jen wondered if Jake would drop over from shock if she hugged him the next time she saw him. Just the thought of it made her have to bit back a giggle.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

Sam pulled into Three Ponies and parked as close to the road as she could. Jake noticed and pulled his truck in next to her.

He got out of the truck and came over to her car, leaning against the side, near the driver's door. Jake didn't say anything, he didn't look at her, he just leaned there letting her know with his presence that he was there if she needed him.

Sam couldn't help but look at the big stone house. She then looked at Jake leaning against her car. She knew what he was doing and she loved him for it.

She took a deep breath and decided that if he was going to be so darn supportive, she should make an effort too. Sam opened the door and climbed out of her car. She saw Jake glance at her out of the corner of his eye.

"I'm okay," she assured him.

Jake wasn't so sure. He could see her trembling.

When she shut the car door behind her, his arm snaked around her waist bringing her up against his side. She nuzzled into his chest.

"I love you, Samantha Anne," Jake told her. "You're my wife. You belong here with me. Nobody is going to tell you anything differently."

He felt her sigh against him. Jake kissed the top of her head near her stitches.

"There are a lot of cars here," Sam murmured.

"There are a lot of people living here," Jake pointed out. He didn't tell her that there looked to be a few more than normal. He wondered who else his mother had invited to welcome Sam home.

Sam nodded. She looked up at him and he met her mouth with his. She turned further into him and he widened his legs, bringing her between them. His hands cupped her face as he brought it to his. Sam's arms ended up around his neck, her hands trailing through his dark, thick, black Shoshone hair.

They lost themselves in their kiss. Each promised the other forever and always. Jake promised to stand with her in facing his family if she needed him to. Sam promised to be brave and to always love him.

"Wow, Jakey gets himself a wife and he actually kisses her," the voice came from nearby.

The couple broke apart, Sam blushing as she looked into the face of Quinn. He was grinning at her and holding out his arms to her. Sam glanced up at Jake who smiled at her. He gave her an almost imperceptible nod.

She threw herself at Quinn who hugged her to his chest. He lifted her up, his strong arms coming around her as she cried against his shoulder.

"I've missed you Sammy," Quinn told her as he held her.

"I've missed you too," Sam sobbed.

Jake watched the two of them a soft smile on his face. Quinn's eyes were shut as he hugged Jake's wife. He could see how much Quinn had missed her. Jake saw Bryan coming up behind his twin and the two smiled at each other. Nate was behind Bryan. Jake figured the rest of the family was in the house watching, giving the brothers this moment.

"Toss her here, Quinn," Bryan told his twin.

Sam's head came up, the tears she shed visible on her face as Quinn tossed her to Bryan whose arms came around her as he caught her and hugged her.

"It feels good to play Samball again," Bryan murmured to her. "Welcome home, Sammy."

"Thanks Bryan," Sam sniffled, her arms wrapped around his neck. "I've actually missed you two playing Samball."

"Toss her here, Bry," Nate opened his arms and caught her when Bryan tossed her over.

Sam wrapped her arms and legs around Nate as they hugged.

Quinn and Bryan gave Jake a hug.

"Welcome home, little man," Bryan told his youngest brother. "Did you have any problems convincing her?"

"A bit," Jake admitted. "She ended up frightened at seeing me there, thinking I was with Dawn and got hurt."

Both twins looked at Sam as Nate put her down. His arm stayed around her.

"You okay, Sammy?" Bryan asked.

Sam's eyes flicked to Jake's.

"Just a bump on the head," Sam assured them.

"Let me get this straight," Quinn started to laugh. "You only agreed to marry Jakey after you received a bump on the head?"

The three other Ely brothers started to laugh. Jake rolled his eyes as he laughed. Sam bit back a giggle.

"Something like that, yeah," Sam nodded.

"Only in this family," Nate shook his head as the five of them started towards the house.

Sam noticed the half finished house, but didn't say anything as she passed it.

Jake's hand gripped Sam's and she looked up at him. He was looking down at her, with an emotion she couldn't read in his dark brown eyes. She gave his hand a squeeze and she then saw the love for her in his eyes.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

Nate opened the door and waited for the others to go through ahead of him.

"Mom invited Grandfather and Sam's family," he whispered to Jake.

Jake nodded as he and Sam went into the house.

"Samantha!" Maxine was hugging her newest daughter-in-law. Sam started sobbing again.

"I'm sorry," Sam murmured to the other woman.

"Nonsense," Maxine insisted. "You didn't do anything wrong. I'm sorry that you had to go through all of that."

"I hurt him so badly," Sam said.

"He's happy now," Maxine looked at her son over the shoulder of his wife. She could see the happiness. Sure, he had loved Dawn and Dawn had helped to heal him, but she could tell that Sam completed him. He would have survived with Dawn, but he would _live_ with Sam.

"Come into the family room," Maxine started to steer the woman she had always considered her daughter towards the doorway.

Sam was shocked to see her family. She ran to her father and was caught up in a hug as she hugged his strong body. Next was Gram who seemed so frail compared to the last time Sam had seen her. Sam hugged Brynna then was reintroduced to Cody. She met her little sister Karen for the first time.

While Sam was getting reacquainted with her family, Maxine hugged her son.

"I'm glad you brought her home," Maxine told him quietly.

"It wasn't easy," Jake admitted.

"Kit told me," Maxine said. "She's all right?"

"She's better," Jake answered. "She's not taken care of herself and she ended up with a bump on the head when she saw us."

"She thought you were there with Dawn," Maxine sighed.

"Yes," Jake nodded.

Maxine touched her son's cheek. "You look better. More relaxed."

"I am," Jake's smile was soft as he glanced at his wife who was now hugging the other wives. They were welcoming her with open arms.

Maxine gave him a hug and let Mac approach him, giving the two of them some privacy.

"It is good to have her back," Mac said. "You're okay?"

"Yes Grandfather, I am," Jake smiled. "Thank you."

"I did nothing," Mac shrugged, tilting his head. "You are worried though."

"Not really worried," Jake clarified. "I'm sorry all of this had to be at the expense of Dawn's happiness."

"You are a good man to worry about her," Mac put his hand on Jake's arm. "She will do very well for herself. Don't worry."

Jake met his grandfather's eyes and nodded.

"You ended up with the woman you were supposed to end up with," Mac shrugged again.

"Yes," Jake murmured, watching Sam with his family and hers. He was thankful that they all welcomed her back as if nothing bad had happened. Almost as if the last two years hadn't happened.

He couldn't help smile as she met Quinn's twins then the rest of the Ely babies. She held Nate's and Vanis' daughter Nicole and Jake couldn't help but picture Sam holding their son or daughter the same way someday.

His attention was pulled from his wife by her father approaching. Wyatt stuck out his hand to his son-in-law.

"Congratulations, Jake," Wyatt told him.

"Thank you, sir," Jake shook the other man's hand.

"We can't thank you enough for bringing her home," Wyatt went on. "We tried for years to convince her to come back." The older man shook his head and Jake could see how Sam's taking off had upset him. "We worried so much about her."

Jake only nodded. They had no idea just how worried they should have been, that Sam had tried twice to kill herself. Which reminded him, he needed to remind her to cover the cut on her wrist until it healed.

"She's coming on roundup?" Wyatt asked.

"Yes," Jake responded.

He smiled as Grace joined them.

"I'm not sure we have enough viable tents for you and Samantha," Gram said.

"She'll stay with my brothers and me," Jake shrugged. "They won't mind."

"I'm sure Wyatt already thanked you, but thank you," Gram put a hand on his arm, giving it a squeeze.

Jake simply nodded.

"Tired?" Jake asked later as the two of them cuddled in his bed. Sam was in his arms, nuzzled into his neck.

"Yes," Sam nodded. She sighed. She wanted to ask Jake about the house.

"I couldn't live in our house," Jake murmured.

Sam was surprised but not so terribly surprised. He'd been doing this to her all of her life.

She nodded, not able to speak right now.

"To be honest, I'm not sure what to do about it now," Jake went on.

"You don't have to make any sudden decisions," Sam said.

"_We_ don't have to make any sudden decisions," Jake corrected. "I wouldn't make that decision without you."

"Maybe when we come back from roundup, we can go through it," Sam suggested, inhaling the manly scent of him.

"I will build you another house," Jake told her.

"Let's see that one first," Sam said. "Maybe it will work."

Jake was overwhelmed and his arms tightened around her. What a woman his wife was. He would do anything for her, anything.

As he held her in his arms, he thought about Dawn. He said a silent thank you to her and wished her well.

Sam raised her head to his, her mouth finding his lips and latching onto them. Jake rolled her under him, her hands tangling in his black hair when he did. Their tongues met and tangled as they were both quickly swept along.

Jake's mouth slash over her cheek to lip her earlobes. She felt his teeth gently take one. She shivered. She heard Jake chuckle in her ear.

Her skin broke out into goosebumps when his lips and tongue trailed down her neck then nibbled on the sensitive part where her neck met her shoulder. She felt his smile on her skin when he realized it.

Both were extremely happy to be together and they set about showing the other just how they felt.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

Sam yawned as she stumbled into the ranch yard at four o'clock the next morning.

"Hey Sammy," Nate greeted her.

Sam waved in his direction and promptly ran into a hard chest.

"Oomph," Sam grunted as she tried to stay on her feet.

"Here," Jake shoved a mug in her hand.

She inhaled the scent of hot chocolate and coffee. Then she snuggled into her husband's neck and inhaled his scent. She like that better.

"Have I told you lately that I love you?" Sam asked, kissing his neck and smiling when he raised his shoulder in response.

"Yeah, you did a pretty good job of it last night," Jake grinned at her, kissing the top of her head.

Sam scratched her stitches as she blushed.

"Stop that, Brat," Jake moved her hand away.

"They itch," Sam complained, then took a sip from her mug.

"You don't have a hat do you?" Jake observed.

"No," Sam shook her head. "It's not something I needed in San Francisco. I have no idea where the one you got me would be."

"After the avalanche," Jake mused.

Sam nodded.

"Too late to call and ask your Gram to bring it," Jake said.

"I have a ball cap I can use," Sam told him.

"It will be better than nothing," Jake nodded. "Don't want your nose to burn." He pressed his lips to the end of it and she smiled at him.

Sam took a long drink from her mug and took off for the big stone house. Jake turned to watch her, noticing how the jeans she wore hugged her butt and her thighs.

"Quit lusting after your wife and help us," Quinn shoved him.

"Huh?" Jake grinned.

Quinn laughed and clapped his hand on Jake's shoulder. "It is good to have her back."

"Yeah, it is," Jake nodded.

All of them looked up as Sam came back out, adjusting a pink ball cap with the words _San Francisco Chronicle_ on the front, upon her head. The four guys looked at each other and started to grin.

"What's funny?" Sam asked, picking up some of the supplies and handing them to Bryan to pack. "My boss from the _Chronicle_ gave me this."

"I hear you're using that wussy pink backpack again," Quinn said.

"What of it?" Sam put her hands on her hips. "You want to borrow it?"

Nate, Bryan and Jake snorted. Quinn grinned.

"Love ya, Sammy," Quinn told her, putting an arm around her.

Sam hugged him back, glad that they all seemed to be picking up from where they left off two years ago. She did love them all like brothers, well except for Jake anyway, and was happy to have them in her life again.

"We ready?" Nate wondered, tossing his keys in his hand.

"Yep, if Pinky here is ready to go," Quinn said.

Sam hit his arm and Quinn laughed.

"Let's get out of here before we end up waking up the wives," Bryan stated.

"Or worse, the kids who wake up the wives," Nate said, quickly getting behind the wheel of his truck.

"Henpecked," Sam teased with a laugh.

"Whipped," Jake corrected, helping her into the truck and then getting in the backseat next to her.

"Oh my gosh, did Jakey just actually make a joke?" Quinn teased getting into the passenger seat.

"I'm not sure who it is that Sammy married, but it can't be Jake," Bryan got in on the other side of Sam.

"Jakey never jokes," Nate laughed.

"Pinky just married someone who looks like Jake," Quinn laughed.

"Har har," Jake grumbled.

"Will you quit calling me Pinky?" Sam huffed.

"Nope," Quinn shook his head, still laughing.

"Hammock stuffer," Sam countered, causing the rest of the Elys to burst out laughing.

They _had_ missed her.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

Sam was trying hard to get some more sleep in while Nate drove them to the roundup point, but she kept remembering things she was going to need.

"Wait," she picked her head up from Jake's chest for what seemed like the tenth time. She heard their snorts, but ignored them. "Do I have a horse?"

"Yeah," Jake assured her, putting her head back down.

"Okay," Sam said into her chest, starting to doze off.

"I don't have chaps," Sam yelped, picking up her head again.

"Darn, I miss those leather ones," Quinn laughed.

"Oh yeah," Bryan nodded. "Nate, pull into Darton and we'll get Sam another pair."

"Are the stores open this early?" Sam wondered.

"No," Jake pushed her head back down.

"My thighs are gonna get sore," Sam picked her head back up.

"We'll massage them for you," Bryan patted her shoulder ignoring Jake's glare.

"Oh Cara will love that," Sam rolled her eyes, putting her head back on Jake's chest and shutting her eyes.

"The only one massaging her thighs will be me," Jake told them.

His brother gave him infuriating grins. He felt Sam's snort and pushed on her head before she could pop it up again. Finally he felt her relax into him and fall asleep a few minutes later.

"Finally," Jake snorted.

"She finally fall asleep?" Nate asked from the driver's seat.

"Yeah," Jake nodded.

"I gotta tell you, little brother," Quinn turned in the front seat. "I liked Dawn, but I love Sammy."

"Me too," Bryan agreed. "I'm like everyone else, just wanting you to be happy, but as much as I liked Dawn…"

"Sammy's one of us," Nate put in. "Dawn fit in okay, but Sammy does without trying."

Jake nodded, remembering his thoughts about divine intervention again. Marrying Dawn probably would have been a mistake. Yes, he had loved her, but now he could see the difference.

The love he had felt for both women was totally different. Sam's love consumed him. It always had from the time he realized how much he had loved her after the avalanche. Even before that his feelings for her had been overpowering.

As he looked back over his young life, how many six year olds would make a four year old girl their best friend? How many young men kept their best friend, a girl, for their whole lives? He'd bet not many.

Now that best friend was his wife, as he'd always thought she'd be except for those two years that he thought she had betrayed him. He'd brought something for her with him and would give it to her later.

His eyes first met Bryan's and they exchanged a smile. Then his gaze met Quinn's and Nate's and they also exchanged smiles. Jake then looked out the window, not seeing any of the scenery.

Jake was thankful to Dawn for healing his heart, but his heart belonged to the woman who had first grasped it in her tiny little hand at four years of age. Jake had loved her from the moment he had laid eyes on her.

His hand played in her hair as her head slowly fell down his body to land in his lap. Jake felt Sam's sigh and couldn't help the soft smile.

Bryan saw it and nudged Quinn, who looked first at his twin who nodded his head slightly at Jake. Quinn looked at his youngest brother caressing his wife's hair and nudged Nate. Nate looked over at Quinn as he drove and Quinn jerked his head towards the backseat. Nate looked in the rearview mirror, then took a look over his shoulder.

The three brothers exchanged grins, happy for their youngest brother and his wife.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

Sam woke up just before they reached the rendezvous point. She yawned, her head still on Jake's lap.

"Hi," she murmured, leaning into him to kiss his full mouth. "I couldn't help myself."

"Neither could I," Jake murmured against her mouth.

"Going to be difficult, isn't it?" she indicted his brothers who were all grinning at them.

"Yes, it will be," Jake's slow grin made her blush.

"Are you warm, Sammy?" Quinn asked.

The other three Elys snorted as Sam blushed deeper.

"Oh shut up," Sam grumbled, sticking her tongue out at them all. They snorted and she laughed.

"So what horse did you bring for me?" Sam asked Jake. "Jester?"

"No," Jake shook his head. "Well Jester's here, but, uh…" He turned away to rub his neck.

"No," Sam whispered. "You still have him?"

Their eyes met and he nodded.

"I planned on selling him," Jake admitted. "I couldn't bring myself to do it."

Sam bit her lip, feeling it wanting to start to tremble.

Nate pulled in and stopped the truck. Jake's brothers bailed out quickly knowing there was going to be more that Jake wanted to tell Sam. Sam looked at them in surprise as they all got out of the truck.

Then she turned back to Jake. He looked nervous.

"Just tell me," Sam said.

"She rode him," Jake told her, watching her face. Their eyes locked, Jake watching her closely.

Sam nodded. "It would be expected wouldn't it?"

She sighed.

"He's a good horse and of course you would put her up on him," she told him, her eyes not leaving his.

She was taking it better than he thought she would and he dug into the inside pocket of his coat and took out a box. Sam glanced down at it, recognizing it immediately. Her eyes flew back to his.

"Are you sure?" Sam asked, her voice barely a whisper.

"Are _you_ sure?" he countered. "I can buy you another."

"No," Sam shook her head.

He handed her the box. Sam sat back in the seat and opened the box. Even though the light was low, the stones in her ring blazed. She put a hand to her mouth as she looked at the three diamond engagement ring and the turtle necklace and earrings also inside.

"I love you, Brat," Jake's voice was soft as he watched her, seeing the tears starting to fill her eyes.

"I adore you, Jake Ely," Sam threw an arm around him, not able to keep her sobs inside.

He held her as she cried, one arm around him holding the box which contained the jewelry she had sent back to him. Finally, her mouth found his as she kissed him. She told him how much it meant to her to have her jewelry back again.

Sam put the box on her lap and took her ring out glancing once at Jake before sliding it on her finger. She moved her hand a bit to watch the stones sparkle.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

"I'll get you a wedding band once we're back from the cattle drive," Jake promised.

"I don't care about that," Sam looked again at him before looking down at her hand.

"I do," Jake told her.

"Then we'll get you one too," Sam said before she pressed her lips against his.

"I can't wear it all the time, but I will when I'm not working," Jake responded, making sure she knew that if he didn't wear it one hundred percent of the time, it wasn't because he didn't love it and her.

"I understand," Sam nodded. With one more kiss, she dug into the box to take out the turtle necklace, putting it around her neck. Her hand strayed to it as it nestled into the base of her neck and she couldn't help the sigh.

Jake smiled softly at her, hearing the sigh.

Sam went to take out the earrings and noticed the other ring. With a frown, she glanced at Jake as she reached for it.

Jake saw the frown and looked down, seeing her pick up Dawn's engagement ring.

"Oh shoot," Jake groaned.

"This was Dawn's?" Sam asked quietly, looking up to meet his eyes.

"Yes," Jake's voice was careful, his expression blanked out.

Nodding, Sam looked back at the ring. Then she held out her hand to look at her brilliant, blazing ring. The difference was shocking and startling. No wonder Dawn had felt second best when she had found it.

Sam put it back in the box and took out the posts she had in her ears before putting in the turtle earrings. When she was done, her hand reached out to touch Jake's jaw, her mouth meeting his.

"I love you and thank you," Sam said simply, surprising Jake. He had expected more than a thank you. Sam saw it on his face.

"She loved you," Sam shrugged.

"Yeah," Jake nodded, still cautious.

Sam looked away wondering how she could tell him the truth without hurting him.

"There's quite a difference between the rings," Sam murmured.

"Not on purpose," Jake said.

"No, but she would think subconsciously there was a difference in how you felt about her," Sam told him.

"I didn't mean it like that," Jake insisted. "I did love her."

"I know you did," Sam nodded. "You don't give your heart away capriciously. If you asked her to marry you, I know you loved her."

She took a deep breath and let it out.

"I'd feel the same way seeing my ring and then hers," Sam's met his again. "It's quite a statement."

Jake rubbed the back of his neck.

"I hope she finds someone almost as wonderful as you," Sam told him.

Sam shocked him with her generosity for Dawn. She saw it in his face before his eyes danced with amusement.

"Almost?" he choked back a laugh.

"Well, nobody is going to be as wonderful as you," Sam said sensibly, grinning as she leaned in to kiss him again.

Jake kissed the woman who was his life, loving her so much he couldn't tell her in words.

"We'll put this away and maybe make a pendant for our firstborn daughter," Sam indicated the box in her hand.

With their eyes still on those of the other, Jake nodded.

"Wyatt's coming," Nate opened the door ending the private moment.

"Okay, thanks," Jake told him before turning back to Sam. "I love you, sweetheart."

"Yes, I know you do and thank God for that every day," Sam leaned in for one more kiss.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

Sam walked towards Gram, a smile on her face. Gram hugged her granddaughter as soon as she was close enough.

"I am so happy for you, honey," Gram told her.

"Thanks Gram," Sam responded. "Life is finally worth living again."

Gram looked into Sam's face at her words, wondering at what she meant.

"It was tough," Sam said and shrugged. She hoped to leave it at that. She didn't want her family to know just how close to death she had come.

She cleared her throat. "You didn't by chance bring my things, did you?"

Gram looked regretful as she shook her head. "Everything's been packed up and put in the barn, but I didn't think to bring it."

Sam sighed.

"I'm sorry, Samantha," Gram said.

"It's okay," Sam touched the bill of her pink cap. "At least I have this."

"You're going to be sore from not having chaps," Gram noted.

"Yeah," Sam conceded. "Plus I haven't really ridden in two years. Oh well, I'm here."

"If you need to take a break, you can ride with me in the van," Gram offered.

"I may have to take you up on that," Sam gave her Gram's cheek a kiss, smelling the powder that she used. Sam felt as if she had truly, finally come home.

She saw Jake saddling up Toby and with a wave at Gram, headed back towards him.

"I can do that," Sam told him.

"I don't mind," Jake smiled at her.

"She didn't think to bring my stuff," Sam said.

"Sorry," Jake's smile vanished.

"It's okay," Sam leaned in and stood on her tiptoes to kiss him. "You can rub them for me later."

Jake snorted as he brought the stirrup down from the saddle horn.

"There is that," Jake grinned.

"Though being in a tent with your brothers is going to put a damper on things," Sam frowned.

"Yeah, a bit," Jake agreed. "We'll figure something out."

"Yeah?" Sam grinned at him.

"Yeah," Jake nodded. "Go ahead and mount. We're about to head out."

Sam looked around and saw everyone else was mounting their horses. Gram had just started driving away in the white van which served as the chuck wagon.

Sam mounted the Paint and settled into her saddle. Jake looked up at her expectantly and she smiled and nodded at him. He swung up on Witch and reined her near the gelding Sam was riding.

"You let me know if you need a massage," Jake's eyes were full of mischief. Darn mustang eyes.

"You know I do," Sam told him saucily.

"Brat, I'm talking about your butt," Jake grinned.

"Sure you were," Sam grinned back.

"Do you want to stay with me?" Jake asked.

"Isn't that why I married you?" Sam asked back.

"I mean today," Jake rolled his eyes.

"Aren't I married to you today?" Sam teased with a laugh.

"You normally ride drag," Jake pointed out.

"I haven't ridden anything in awhile," Sam reminded him.

"Well, I don't know about that Brat," Jake's grin grew into his tomcat smiling in the sun smug grin.

Sam went white hot. Toby danced under her, picking up the tension in her body as she tried to get her lust under control.

"Do you know how bad I want…," Sam moaned, taking a gulp. "You, right now?"

"About as much as me wanting you," Jake murmured.

Sam leaned over, her mouth finding his. Rather than kiss her like he wanted to, he gave her a quick kiss and pulled away.

"Have pity on me, baby," Jake groaned.

"For now," Sam told him. "Figure out what we can do."

"I will," Jake promised. "Now are you going to ride with me or not today."

"I better not," Sam sighed.

Jake snorted and Sam giggled.

"See you later," Jake loosened Witch's reins. Sam watched as he rode off knowing she was the luckiest woman on the planet.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

Sam's legs were like jello when she dismounted from her horse later that day. She would have fallen if Quinn hadn't been there, seen what was happening and caught her.

"You okay, Pinky?" he asked.

She looked up at him, ready to make a sarcastic remark to him, then saw the real concern in his eyes. Sam sighed.

"I'm obviously not used to riding this long," Sam told him. "Please don't tell Jake how bad off I am. He'll worry too much."

"Sammy," Quinn was barely holding back his laughter. "I don't think anyone will have to tell Jake. You can barely stand up and you haven't tried to walk yet."

Sam gave another big sigh. She looked around.

"I'm so sore I could scream," she admitted.

"You don't think Jakey's gonna notice?" Quinn let out his laughter.

"I had hoped I could fake it," Sam said.

"Fakin's never good, Sammy," Quinn grinned at her.

She took her pink ball cap off and swatted him with it. Her actions only made Quinn laugh harder.

"I've forgotten how bad you are," Sam put her hat back on, feeding her ponytail through the back.

"You've missed me though, right?" Quinn asked with a grin, undoing the cinch on her saddle.

"I've missed all of you," Sam was suddenly very serious. She looked at him wondering how much Jake had told them. "You have no idea how tortured I was thinking I had betrayed Jake."

Quinn stopped undoing the saddle cinch on Chip and looked down at her.

"No I don't," he told her. "But if it was anything like what I saw with Jake…" He shook his head.

"I hurt him so badly," Sam felt the emotions welling up in her again.

"Now though, you're making him really happy," Quinn put his arm around her shoulders.

"He makes me happy too," Sam said. "Now however, my butt has blisters. Even Jake can't make those feel better."

Quinn burst out laughing.

"Bet he could make you forget them for awhile," Quinn raised an eyebrow as he took off Chip's saddle, then Toby's.

He and Sam started walking towards the tents.

"Thanks for carrying that," Sam told him.

"Not a problem, Pinky," he grinned widely.

"Keep it up, Hammock Stuffer," Sam grumbled.

Nate and Bryan looked up as the two of them entered the tent.

"Sore, Sammy?" Bryan asked her.

"Yeah, a little," Sam nodded.

Nate raised an eyebrow. "A little?"

"Okay, a lot," Sam wanted to throw herself down on the sleeping bag, but she wasn't sure she could get up again.

"Need some help?" Bryan wondered.

"I'm not sure I can get up again," Sam admitted.

She heard Quinn snort and she rolled her eyes.

"We'll help you up, Sammy," Nate assured her.

"Don't have that problem myself," Quinn put down the saddles and lay down on his sleeping bag.

"You are so full of it," Sam managed to get on the sleeping bag and then lay on her back. "My gosh, this ground is hard."

Quinn began with a laugh.

Sam took off one of her boots and threw it at him.

Sam was eating with Jake's brothers when he showed up. She watched as he got something to eat and made his way towards her. Sam smiled at him as he sat down next to her, then leaned over to kiss him.

"You look tired," she said, glancing at him as she stuffed a forkful of potatoes into her mouth.

"Am," Jake answered. "How are you doing?"

"I'm okay," Sam lied, fully aware of the looks she received from Nate, Bryan and Quinn.

Jake glanced at his brothers before his eyes flicked to Sam again.

"Hmm," Jake murmured. "Shoot, I forgot to get a soda. Could you get me one, Brat?"

Sam's fork stopped in midair. She heard the snorts from Jake's annoying brothers.

"Okay, I'm sore," Sam snapped, ignoring Jake's tomcat lying in the sun grin. "There you happy?"

"'Course not," Jake told her. "I don't want you bravin' it out either. Tell me the truth though when I ask."

Sam sighed and nodded.

"What hurts?" Jake asked.

"A better question might be what doesn't hurt," Sam countered.

"That bad, huh?" Jake wondered.

"Yeah," Sam responded. "I think my butt has blisters."

"Let's hope your magnificent butt doesn't have blisters," Jake grinned. Sam blushed.

Jake chuckled and the sound of it made Sam's skin break out in goosebumps.

"Want me to distract her father so you two can slip away?" Quinn asked.

Startled, Jake and Sam turned to look at his brothers. The couple had forgotten they were there. Sam blushed, looking down at her plate.

Jake glared at the youngest twin. Quinn's grin was insufferable. He glanced at Bryan and Nate and their grins weren't much better.

"You two make me miss Vanis," Nate grinned at the two of them.

"You've got two kids, you should know," Jake joked.

"It will be three soon if I have anything to do about it," Nate teased.

"Well if you don't, who does?" Bryan laughed.

Sam was shaking her head at them.

"You two better get busy," Quinn grinned. "You have some catching up to do."

That got the four Ely brothers laughing. Sam smiled as she blushed. It was going to take some time getting used to their joking again.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

"Hi Dad," Sam walked up to her father the next morning.

"Hi honey," Dad gave her a hug.

Sam groaned.

"You sore?" Dad asked knowingly.

"Yeah," Sam admitted. "Well actually I'm beyond sore and down right hurting."

"You're not used to riding," it wasn't a question.

"No," Sam shook her head.

"I'm glad you're back," Dad told her.

"Me too," Sam murmured, trying not to remember the pain of why she hadn't come home.

"You look a bit thin," Dad went on.

_If he only knew how thin she had gotten. She looked downright fat compared to how she looked just a few weeks before._

"I'm getting better," Sam assured him.

Dad nodded, not convinced.

"Where's Ace?" Sam changed the subject.

"Home," Dad told her. "Cody couldn't come, but he wanted his horse home with him."

"Ace is doing well?" Sam asked.

"He's great," Dad said. "The perfect horse for Cody."

"He's a good horse," Sam nodded.

"You're okay?" Dad asked.

"Yeah, I'm okay now," Sam told him, meeting his eyes so much like hers. "I wasn't there for awhile, but I am now."

"I'm happy you and Jake were able to work out what was wrong," Dad said.

Sam nodded. "Me too."

Dad put his arm around her, giving her a hug.

They looked up to see Jake standing nearby holding the reins of Toby and Witch. Both horses were saddled.

"I guess I better get out there," Sam murmured, looking at her husband.

Jake's eyes met Dad's over Sam's head. The two men exchanged much with their glances. Dad gave Jake a slight nod which Jake returned.

Sam strode towards Jake. He noticed she was walking stiffly.

"Thank you," Sam smiled at him. Jake gave her a quick smile. She leaned into his chest, raising her head for his kiss. His full mouth met hers briefly, the two of them smiling as they kissed.

"Need some help?" Jake asked.

"Sure," Sam got into position, lifting her leg for his boost. She groaned as she put her leg over the tobiano Paint and settled into the saddle.

"Thank you," Sam smiled as he nodded and then swung up onto Witch.

"If you need to take a break for awhile, do so," Jake told her.

"I'm not riding in the chuck wagon," Sam raised her eyebrows.

"You will if you need to," Jake responded.

"Oh no I won't," Sam shook her head.

"Brat," Jake began.

"Don't Brat me, Jake," Sam glared at him. "I'll be fine."

Jake wasn't so sure. Sam could see it in his face.

"I'll be fine," Sam said again.

Jake gave up. "See you later then."

He whirled Witch away and Sam watched as the big black mare loped away from her. She vowed she would be okay, even if it killed her.

She rode Toby towards the back of the herd. Sam gritted her teeth against the stiffness when Toby broke into a trot. It was almost enough to break her resolve about not riding in the van with Gram.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

Sam was daydreaming as she rode at the back of the herd. Toby snorted, bringing Sam out of her reverie.

"What's the matter fella?" Sam asked the horse, glad Jake wasn't there to make fun of her for talking to the horse like he understood her.

Sam heard another horse snort and looked around for the source. She saw the silver stallion on a nearby ridge. She felt her heart swell in her chest.

She looked around to make sure the coast was clear before calling out the Phantom's secret name.

"Zanzibar!" Sam called softly.

The gray stallion's ears pricked her way. Sam knew he had heard her. He bobbed his head twice before picking his way towards her. Sam pulled Toby to a halt and waited for the stallion.

Cautiously, the horse came to her. She saw the stallion roll an eye at Toby as if he wondered who the gelding was, but continued towards Sam. When Toby didn't object, the Phantom came forward and laid his head across Sam's lap.

"Hey buddy," Sam scratched the stallion's ears. "Did you think I was gone forever?"

The Phantom blew out his lips.

"Yeah, me too," Sam murmured. "Jake saved me from myself."

The horse snorted and Sam laughed.

"Now, now," Sam scolded the stallion. "I do love him a lot. You two can share me."

The Phantom rubbed the side of his head against Sam's body, almost making her fall out of her saddle.

"Hey," Sam yelped. The stallion threw up his head, catching Sam under the chin. She literally saw stars before she dropped off of Toby, unconscious before she hit the ground.

Toby shied and took off running towards the herd. The Phantom shied and ran in the opposite direction.

Jake was riding near the middle of the herd of cattle with Nate when they saw Toby streak by. The two brothers looked at each other, startled.

"Darn," Nate pulled up his horse.

"Shoot," Jake swore, reining in Witch and turning in the saddle to see if he could spy Sam behind them.

"Come on," Jake turned Witch around and started back the way Toby had come. Nate's horse was on Witch's heels as the two of them raced back.

Jake saw Sam first and was off of Witch before the big black mare had come to a complete stop. Sam was just lifting her head when Jake knelt next to her, Nate nearby.

"What happened, Sam?" Jake found himself shaking as he touched her to determine if anything was broken.

She looked at him and he saw the small cut under her chin and the swelling. His fingers touched it and she flinched.

"The Phantom clipped me and I fell," Sam murmured.

"What do you mean clipped?" Jake's voice was harsh.

Nate laid a hand on his arm and Jake took a deep breath before letting it out.

"Tell us what happened, Sammy," Nate asked.

"The Phantom came up to say hi," Sam flicked her eyes from Nate's face to Jake's. Nate's eyes were encouraging, Jake's showed his anger.

"I, I…" Sam stuttered, looking quickly away from Jake.

Nate gave his youngest brother a dirty look and Jake took another deep breath before blanking out his expression.

"What happened after your horse came to say hi?" Jake asked calmly.

Sam gave him a look, not sure if she trusted how calm he appeared. There had been issues between Jake and the Phantom previously.

"He had his head in my lap and I was scratching his ears," Sam told him. "Then he rubbed his head against me and almost pushed me off of Toby. I startled him and he caught me under the chin. That's all I remember until I found myself here."

Sam looked at her husband.

"Is there anything broken?" Nate asked.

"No," Sam shook her head.

"Can you stand up?" Jake wondered.

Sam started to get up. Jake and Nate both took one of her arms, helping her to her feet.

"Dizzy?" Jake asked.

"No," Sam answered honestly. "A bit stiff, but that's due to not being used to riding too."

"You didn't hit your head?" Jake looked down at her.

"I don't think so," Sam told him.

"Here, Sammy," Nate picked up her pink ball cap which had come off and handed it to her.

Sam took it from him, putting the bill of the cap in her mouth before taking her hair out of its ponytail and then retying it back. She then put her ponytail through the back of the cap and adjusted the pink cap on her head.

"I'm okay," Sam assured them both.

"I don't know, Sammy," Nate pointed at her chin. "That's a pretty big bump. You didn't lose any teeth did you?"

Sam shook her head.

"Wyatt's prolly getting together a search team," Jake said. Sam frowned. "Are you okay to ride?"

"Yeah," Sam responded. "I'm just nothing but trouble to you, aren't I?"

Nate snorted. Jake's mouth twitched.

"Well, I've been telling you that for eighteen years, Brat," Jake chuckled. He laughed catching Witch's reins after Sam had swatted him.

Sam noticed both guys were grinning as they mounted their horses. Jake held out his hand to her. She grabbed it and he pulled her up behind him. Sam put her arms around her husband's waist and held him tightly.

"Well, this was worth it anyway," Sam said as she laid her cheek on Jake's back.

"All you had to do was ask, Brat," Jake grinned at his brother. "You didn't have to fall off your horse for it."

The three of them laughed as they headed back towards the herd.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

Sam was happy when roundup was over. She had been glad to go, but her body had protested the riding ten hours a day. Even after the two weeks, she still was having a problem with the soreness in her back and legs.

Jake had tried massaging her back, but all that had done was make both of them want the other. Finally, Jake had gone to his brothers and asked them to give him some private time. Grinning at their youngest brother, Bryan, Nate and Quinn had nodded.

"You're still sorta on your honeymoon after all," Bryan had said.

"Need any advice?" Quinn had asked.

Nate snorted.

"Nah, I think I can figure it out," Jake had retorted, causing all three of his brothers to chuckle.

Jake stalked away from them, back to the tent. He refused to even acknowledge them as he zipped the tent door shut on him and his wife.

Sam had been lying on the sleeping bag and picked her head up, hearing the zipper.

"What's up?" Sam asked.

Jake quickly laid down with her, taking her into his arms.

"Jake?" Sam squeaked out before his lips captured hers.

"Make love to me, Brat," Jake said against her mouth.

That was all Sam had needed. She lay back, bringing Jake with her. She whimpered as she was swept along by his kisses.

The two of them were soon naked.

Afterwards, they lay together.

"We went too long," Sam gave a laugh.

"Kinda looks that way doesn't it?" Jake chuckled.

"You're okay?" Jake asked, brushing back her hair and gently kissing her mouth.

"Oh yes," Sam smiled as she nibbled on his bottom lip.

Jake rolled onto his back. Her fingers played through his thick hair as they relaxed together.

"Where are your brothers?" Sam asked.

"Prolly waiting impatiently right outside the door," Jake chuckled.

Sam blushed.

"I suppose we should get up, huh?" Sam sighed.

"Probably should," Jake agreed. "You're sure you're okay?"

"I'm always okay when you make love to me," Sam told him.

"I love you, baby," Jake kissed her.

"I love you too," Sam said against his mouth. "Maybe you gave me a baby this time."

"I can't wait to have babies with you," Jake told her, getting up and starting to put his clothes back on.

"After all, we have some catching up to do," Sam laughed.

Jake paused in pulling his shirt back on, giving her a look and a lopsided grin.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20**

A few weeks after roundup, Sam woke up alone in their bed the cramping just starting in her abdomen. She wasn't pregnant this month.

She burrowed into the pillow, curling up into a ball.

"You okay?" she heard Jake's voice. He had just come in from taking a shower.

"Yeah," Sam nodded, her head barely visible.

Jake sat on the edge of the bed. "I need to go into town for a bit."

"Okay," Sam told him.

He moved the quilt down so he could see her face.

"You're sure you're okay?" he asked.

Sam looked up at him. Jake lay next to her, wrapping his arms around her.

"I'm not pregnant," Sam murmured into his chest.

"Don't worry about it, baby," Jake rubbed her back. "There's no rush. We'll get pregnant."

Sam nodded, feeling his mouth against the top of her head.

"How's your head?" Jake asked Sam. He had taken her stitches out a couple of days ago.

"Fine," Sam's hand found where the stitches had been. "It looks okay?"

"Looks good," Jake parted her hair to look.

"How long will you be gone today?" Sam asked, rolling closer to him as she kissed him.

"A couple of hours, I imagine," Jake said against her mouth.

The kiss escalated, their tongues invading the mouth of the other. Dancing, tempting, swirling they kissed. Jake's hands tangled in her thick auburn hair as he kept his mouth on hers. One of Sam's hands moved to behind his neck.

Jake rolled her under him.

When Sam's hands trailed through his thick black hair, Jake grabbed both of her wrists in one of his large hands, keeping her from touching him. Sam protested but he ignored her.

He moved down her body, his mouth licking, sucking and biting as he went until he paused above her belly to give it a kiss.

"Maybe next month," Jake whispered against her skin.

Sam felt her heart flip in her chest.

"My gosh, Jake," Sam murmured afterwards.

"I love you Samantha," Jake told her as he lipped her ear lobe again.

"I love you too," Sam managed to say to him, her eyes closed.

Jake finally rolled over onto his back bringing Sam with him. As he tucked her against him, he hoped that she understood what she meant to him.

"My cramps are better," Sam whispered.

"I'm glad," Jake whispered back. "I adore you wife."

Sam smiled against his neck.

"I'm going to have to take another shower," Jake sighed.

"Wasn't it worth it?" Sam asked.

"Oh yeah," Jake chuckled.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

Jake was gone by the time Sam got up, showered and ready. His truck was gone from in front of the big stone barn.

Sam left the house, walking towards Quinn's and Debi's house. She glanced at the house that would have been Jake's and Dawn's and stopped in front of it. She shrugged and changed direction.

Sam tried the front door and it opened. She went in and looked around to see whether or not she could tolerate the layout.

She was honest with herself and didn't care for the layout. It wasn't open enough for Sam, like her house with Jake that Bryan and Cara was living in, would have been. In order to live in this house, Sam would want to take out a few of the walls and she wasn't sure it could be done.

"Look at it objectively," Sam said out loud to herself.

She went through the rooms, taking in the details. She tried not to think about Dawn living here with Jake. She tried just thinking of it as another house. She still didn't like it. She didn't like the layout and it had nothing to do with Dawn.

Sam sighed wondering what to do or say to Jake about it.

She left the house, closing the door behind her. She walked to Debi's house and knocked on the door.

"Hey," Debi greeted her sister-in-law with a hug.

"How are you feeling?" Sam asked, looking down at Debi's belly.

"Bloated," Debi laughed, pulling Sam inside the house.

"When are you due?" Sam wondered.

"Another month," Debi answered.

"Just one?" Sam asked.

"Yes, thank goodness," Debi nodded. "Another little boy."

"Where are the other little darlings?" Sam laughed.

"Sleeping," Debi grinned.

"How'd you get all three of them to sleep at the same time?" Sam wondered.

"They're pretty good about that," Debi responded. "Can I get you something to drink?"

"Nah," Sam shook her head. "Want me to get you something?"

"I'd die for a cup of coffee," Debi sighed.

"I'm sorry," Sam told her as they sat in the living room.

"I'm used to it," Debi smiled. "Have I told you lately how happy I am you're back?"

"Thanks Debi," Sam returned her smile. "I wasn't sure I'd ever be happy again."

"But you are," Debi said. "It's evident just looking at you."

"Yes I am," Sam nodded. "I never stopped loving him even when I knew how badly I had hurt him."

"It was bad," Debi frowned.

"I know," Sam told her. "Quinn told me how bad it was."

"We were all concerned about him," Debi went on.

Sam could only nod. It had been bad for her too. Jake, at least, had been able to move on. He had dated and eventually gotten engaged. Sam hadn't been able to move on. She had tried to kill herself twice.

She looked away and shuddered. Sam was startled when she felt Debi's hand on her arm.

"I don't know everything," Debi's voice was soft and gentle. "I don't need to know everything. You both suffered. Now you're back together as you should be."

"Sometimes I still can't believe it," Sam sighed. "I didn't want Darby, the girl I had talked to in Hawaii, to tell Kit."

"Why not?" Debi asked.

"Jake was happy," Sam blinked back tears. "He was getting married. I didn't want to hurt him anymore. I had hurt him enough."

Debi nodded in understanding. "I'm not sure I could be that unselfish."

Sam shrugged. "I wasn't sure I'd be alive a whole lot longer."

Debi's startled eyes looked at Sam. Debi seemed to realize what Sam was saying.

"Oh Sam," Debi murmured.

Sam wiped her eyes. "I'm okay now," she insisted.

"Good," Debi tried to smile.

Sam did smile. "It is good."

"Any cousins yet for my kids?" Debi raised her eyebrows.

"Not this month," Sam frowned. "Not that we aren't trying."

"Trying's fun," Debi grinned.

"You've been trying and succeeding a lot," Sam laughed.

"Quinn's potent," Debi shrugged with a laugh of her own.

"It appears so," Sam's laughter increased.

"What can I say?" Debi shrugged again, holding up her hands. "I love my husband."

"Four kids is proof of that," Sam said.

"I'm just glad this one is a singleton too," Debi responded. "Not sure I could do twins again."

"Mommy," they heard one of the children wake up.

"Come on, things are about to get interesting," Debi managed to stand up and Sam joined her. Together they went into the bedroom, Sam looking forward to spending time with Quinn's and Debi's kids.


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22**

Once the kids were all up and had something to eat, Sam got to know her new nieces and nephew. Debi was laughing as Sam played tag with them first.

Then a bit later, the little ones hid while Sam covered her eyes and counted to ten.

"Ready or not, here I come," Sam shouted.

Debi sat on the couch, not giving Sam any clue as to where her children were hiding.

"I really suck at this," Sam said under her breath to Debi. "Mac had to tell me where Jake normally hid when we were kids."

Debi laughed as Sam started looking. Sam pretended not to hear Sean giggling as he hid under one of the beds.

"Where's Sean?" Sam asked loudly. "He's hidden so well I'll never find him."

She bit back a giggle when she heard him giggle. Sam backed out of the room right into a hard chest. Arms came around her and picked her up.

"Gotcha Sammy," Quinn grinned as he tossed her over his shoulder.

"No Samball," Sam shrieked as he patted her butt.

"Too late, little sis," Quinn headed towards the front door. "Hey kids, come watch Uncle Bryan and I play Samball."

Sam could hear his children scrambling out of whatever hiding places they had been in. She picked up her head and grinned at them, pounding on their father's butt as they went outside. The kids all thought that was funny and their laughter filled her ears.

"Bry," Quinn shouted. "Look what I have."

"Samball!" Bryan yelled.

Quinn brought Sam off of his shoulder to settle in his arms before Sam found herself flying through the air to be caught by Bryan. Quinn's three children screamed with laughter. Then Quinn started running next to Bryan who was running with Sam in his arms.

Sam was then tossed back to Quinn. Her peals of laughter rang out as Quinn pretended he was going to drop her.

"Me Daddy, me," Natalie ran after her father.

Quinn put Sam down and picked up his daughter. He tossed her, her screams filling the ranch yard, to his twin who tossed her back.

Quinn and Bryan ended up throwing Quinn's kids back and forth. Nate joined them and his kids wanted in on it too. Soon all the kids were being thrown around between the three men, much to the nervousness of their mothers.

Maxine was standing on the porch watching. She was used to her boys tossing Sam around and knew how careful they really were when they were doing this.

Sam caught her eyes, the two women exchanging much in that glance.

Maxine came off the porch to stand next to the young woman she always had thought of as her daughter. Sam leaned into her when Maxine put her arm around her.

"We're having a party tonight," Maxine announced.

"What are we celebrating?" Nate asked as he caught his son Hunter from Bryan.

"Jake and Sam never had a proper reception," Maxine tightened her arm around Sam's shoulder. "Tonight's the night."

"You don't have to," Sam murmured.

"Of course I do," Maxine corrected her. "This is perfect. Jake's not here right now to pout about my doing it."

Sam snorted as Maxine laughed.


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23**

Jake came home a few hours later. Sam had just gotten out of the shower and was bent over towel drying her hair. The strong arms came around her and brought her up against him. Sam squealed.

"My gosh, I love you wife," Jake told her. He spoke the truth. She was his soulmate and had been since he had been six years old. There was no doubt in his mind of that fact now.

"I love you, husband," Sam answered him.

Jake stepped away from her and Sam turned to face him. He took her into his arms kissing her mouth. Sam's lips moved over his.

"Did you talk to your mom?" Sam asked against his mouth.

"No, why?"

"She's throwing us a reception tonight," Sam nibbled his bottom lip.

"That's why the kitchen is full of food," Jake mused and Sam nodded.

"Did you have a good day today?" Sam asked. "I missed you."

"I missed you too," Jake hugged her close to him. "Yes I did have a good day."

"Good," Sam didn't ask him what he had done. She trusted him and he'd tell her if he wanted her to know.

"You're not going to ask me?" Jake teased, putting her from him and grinning down at him.

"Nope," Sam grinned up at him, shaking her head.

"Wow, are you sure you're okay?" Jake's grin grew wider when she swatted him. "I'll show you a bit later what I got today."

"Okay," Sam pursed her lips and kissed him again. She tousled his hair, loving the feel of his thick black hair between her fingers.

Sam and Jake dressed for the party that Jake's mom was throwing for them. They had taken a shower together after making love in the bathroom. That had caused them to wash the other, leading to making love again. Finally, Sam complained that her skin was turning into prunes and they left the shower to go dress in their room.

After she had dressed in a pair of black capris and a black and white striped shirt, she sat on the bed, her hair in one hand.

"Do you think Nate would braid this for me?" Sam smiled at her husband as he stood bare-chested in front of her, buckling the belt on his jeans.

"You still don't know how to braid hair?" Jake asked, surprised.

"Yeah, I do, I'm just being lazy," Sam told him.

Jake came to her, sitting behind her and pulling back her hair. She felt his fingers run through her auburn mane and shut her eyes, loving the feel of his hands on her.

"What are you doing?" Sam asked a few moments later when his fingers still were in her hair.

"Braiding," Jake answered as if she should have known.

"You're braiding my hair?" Sam turned her head, wanting to look at him.

"Stop," Jake pushed her head forward again.

"You _are_ braiding my hair," Sam yelped, shocked. "Where did you learn to do this?"

"My little friend liked to have her hair braided when she was a kid," Jake shrugged. "So Adam and then Nate showed me how."

Sam's head snapped around so quickly, her hair flew out of his hands. "Are you serious?"

"Very," Jake gathered her hair again, turning her head back.

"Jake," Sam gasped. "That has to be one of the sweetest things you've ever done or said to me."

"I loved my little friend," Jake shrugged again.

"Your little friend loves you too," Sam felt tears in her eyes. My gosh, this big strong man was actually braiding her hair for her and doing it so gently.

"Do you have a tie?" Jake asked a moment later.

Sam handed it to him and she felt Jake wrap it around her braid.

"There," Jake moved the hair to kiss the back of her neck. Sam shivered and Jake saw the goosebumps.

Jake leaned away from her and she heard the drawer on the table next to the bed open and close. The next thing she knew, he had thrust a small box over her shoulder at her.

She whipped her head around, her braid hitting him in the face.

"What's this?" she looked to the box then back at him.

"Open it and find out," Jake urged, lifting the box closer to her.

Sam took the box from him and slowly opened it. She gasped at the ring inside. It was a wedding band with three small diamonds in the band. It looked like a perfect match for her wonderful engagement ring that she wore.

"Jake?" Sam's tear filled eyes lifted to his.

"You needed a wedding band," he shrugged. "I got some when I went into town today."

"I love it," Sam told him, giving him a kiss. Then she tilted her head at him. "Some?"

Jake leaned away from her again and took another box out of the drawer. When he opened it, she saw a matching men's band. Her eyes flew to his.

"I needed one too," Jake told her. "Will you put it on my finger?"

"Your finger?" Sam repeated, almost in a daze.

"Well I'm sure Quinn would rather see it in my nose," Jake teased.

Sam laughed. He handed her that box as well and she took the band out.

All teasing and laughter was gone as their eyes locked. Sam could see the emotion in his dark brown eyes. Jake held out his left hand to her.

"I, Samantha Anne, take you Jacob Dylan, as my husband for the rest of my life," Sam said, tears dripping down her face as she slid the ring onto his finger.

Jake picked up the other box back from where she had placed it on the bed and took out the band within.

"I, Jacob Dylan, take you Samantha Anne, as my wife for the rest of my life," Jake told her, slipping the band on her finger.

Their lips met once, twice, gently, emotionally. Jake's thumb wiped away her tears.

"I love you," Sam said against his mouth.

"I adore you, Brat," Jake countered, his lips pressing against hers again.

"Oh wait," Sam pulled away from him. "The wedding band needs to go on first."

Jake chuckled as she pulled off the rings, putting the wedding band on then following up with the blazing diamond ring.

"Why does that matter?" Jake was curious.

"I don't know," Sam shrugged. "I just remember reading that somewhere."

"Now we're really married," Jake smiled at her.

"You told me we were married the first time we made love," Sam reminded him.

"We were," Jake nodded.

"We got sidetracked there for awhile, but everything's the way it should be now," Sam said.

"Yes baby, it is," Jake's mouth captured hers again.


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter 24**

"Jakey!" Quinn greeted him when Sam and Jake came into the family room.

"Yeah?" Jake gave his brother a look.

"Just surprised to see it, is all," Quinn shrugged. "Nice though."

Sam looked from Quinn to Jake wondering what she was missing. She saw Quinn look over her head to look at Jake. She turned quickly to look up at Jake, but he had blanked out his expression.

"What am I missing?" Sam asked.

"She doesn't know?" Quinn grinned.

"She doesn't know what?" Sam wondered, looking up at her husband.

"Nothin'," Jake rubbed the back of his neck.

"I'll ask Debi," Sam stuck her tongue out at both of them before going to find Quinn's wife.

"She's gonna flip," Quinn predicted.

"Probably," Jake agreed.

"Why'd you do it?" Quinn had to ask.

"It was time," Jake shrugged. "I can think of it and her now without wanting to scream."

"Scream in pain," Quinn said.

Jake nodded. "Which is why I dumped it in the first place."

"I'm glad for you, Jakey," Quinn clapped a hand on his youngest brother's shoulder.

"Me too," Jake looked at the youngest twin.

They saw Bryan coming towards them. "What's got Sammy's panties in a twist?"

"What?" Jake glanced towards his wife who was glowering at him.

He left his brothers to head towards Sam. Her eyes narrowed as he approached.

"What's wrong?" he asked her.

"You tell me," Sam retorted.

"I have no idea," Jake told her.

"Nobody will tell me anything," Sam snapped.

"Oh for…," Jake grabbed her arm, intending to take her into the kitchen. She pulled her arm out of his hand. "Brat."

"Don't Brat me, Jake Ely," Sam responded.

"Come on," Jake grabbed her, not letting her get away from him this time. He went into the kitchen with her. His mother was in there, decorating a cake. She looked up at the couple, saw the looks on both of their faces and left the kitchen without a word.

"I bought something today," Jake told her once they were alone.

"I know, the rings," Sam gave him a look as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Something besides just the rings," Jake said.

"What?" Sam asked.

"I think it's better that I show you," Jake responded. He went to the door, opening it. He waved her through first and shut the door behind them.

Sam looked up at him as she stood on the porch, waiting for him to explain. Instead, Jake pointed. Sam looked to where he was pointing not seeing anything different at first.

Then she gasped, her hands coming up to cover her mouth as she saw what it was.

"An Avalanche?" Sam squeaked out behind her hands.

"A navy one," Jake said.

"Why?" Sam's eyes flew to his.

"Why do you think?" Jake asked his own question.

Sam shook her head. Jake gave a longsuffering sigh.

"Brat, I bought the first one because I realized after that avalanche, how much I loved you," Jake told her.

Sam nodded.

"I sold it when I thought you had betrayed me," Jake went on. He gave another loud sigh and rubbed the back of his neck. "I couldn't look at an Avalanche without thinking of you. I didn't want to think of you."

Sam looked away but not before he saw the pain in her face and the tears in her eyes. His hand reached for her chin, making her look at him.

"It's in the past, baby," Jake reminded her.

Sam nodded. "I know," she managed to say.

"Now, I can look at one and think of you," Jake's eyes pinned hers. "I want to."

"I want you to?" Sam's voice was trembling.

Jake's mouth twitched.

"I loved that truck," Jake admitted. "I hated giving it up but…"

"I understand," Sam nodded and she did.

She pulled her chin out of his hand and threw her arms around his neck.

"I love you," Sam told him.

"I adore you, Brat," Jake met her mouth with his.

"Have you bought anything else today?" Sam nibbled Jake's bottom lip.

"No, just those things," Jake chuckled.

"Okay," Sam grinned.

"Maybe we better get back before they think the marriage is in trouble before they gave us a reception," Jake grinned at her.

Sam laughed, giving him another quick kiss.


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter 25**

During the party, Sam's phone rang. She blushed knowing everyone was looking at her and took the phone out of her pocket. She was just going to shut it off when she saw who it was from.

"I need to take this," Sam said and headed out of the family room.

"Johnny?" Sam answered the phone.

"How ya doing, Sam?" Johnny asked. To Sam he almost sounded drunk.

"Are you okay?" Sam wondered.

"I'm great," Johnny laughed. "You?"

"I'm great," Sam answered. "A bit confused, but great."

"Yes you are great," Johnny laughed again.

"Huh?" Sam wasn't sure what was going on with him.

"So tell me how's it feel to win a Pulitzer?" Johnny wondered.

"What?" Sam screamed.

Everyone in the family room looked towards the kitchen.

"You won, Sam," Johnny was really laughing now.

"Oh my gosh, I won?" Sam yelped. She took the phone from her face, jumped up and down and let out a cowgirl yell.

"What's going on?" Nate asked Jake.

"No idea," Jake shook his head as he looked to where Sam had disappeared. He shrugged at the others before heading towards the kitchen. He saw his wife jumping up and down as she laughed.

"I can't believe it," Sam said into the phone.

"Believe it," Johnny told her. "Do you want to come back to work?"

"I can't," Sam responded. "I'm going to apply at the _Darton Review-Journal_ though."

Jake raised an eyebrow behind her. He hadn't known she was still thinking about that.

"They'll snatch you up in a second," Johnny said. "If they don't they're fools."

"Do I have to do anything?" Sam asked.

"You need to go to New York to accept it," Johnny told her.

"New York?" Sam yelped. "City?"

Johnny laughed.

"When?" Sam inquired.

"About a month," Johnny responded.

"Oh wow, this is unreal," Sam gushed. "Wait until I tell Jake."

"Tell Jake what?" Jake asked behind her, startling Sam causing her to squeak.

"I better go, Johnny," Sam told her ex-boss.

"Sure thing, Sam," Johnny said. "Call me if you change your mind about coming back. I'll send you the details on the Pulitzer presentation."

"Thanks. Bye," Sam hung up her phone. She kept her eyes on her husband who was leaning against the doorframe, his arms crossed, one leg out in front of him. He looked bored and Sam knew he was anything but.

"That was Johnny," Sam told him. "My old boss at the _Chronicle_."

Jake simply nodded.

"I won a Pulitzer Prize," Sam's mouth broke into a huge smile.

"Congratulations," Jake said, moving towards her to give her a hug. Sam wasn't fooled. She could see that while he was happy for her, he wasn't overjoyed about something.

Sam threw her arms around his neck and kissed him, deciding to be happy enough for both of them. She jumped up and down in his arms, her mouth meeting his when she jumped up and could reach it.

"What's going on?" Maxine asked from the doorway. She looked from Sam who looked ecstatic to Jake who looked worried. "Are you pregnant?"

"What?" Sam yelped. "No."

Jake's face slammed shut.

"I won a Pulitzer," Sam screamed, already out of his arms.

"A Pulitzer?" Maxine yelled, rushing forward to hug her daughter-in-law. "Oh Sam, that's wonderful."

Maxine led Sam back into the family room, leaving Jake standing alone in the kitchen. Jake heard the excitement from everyone else in the house about Sam winning the prize. He knew he should be excited too, but he was hurt that she had dismissed that she wasn't pregnant so quickly. Had she changed her mind about having his children now that she had won this prestigious prize?

He wondered.


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter 26**

"What's wrong?" Sam asked him later as they stripped out of their clothes and got into their bed.

"Nothin'," Jake answered, pulling the covers up.

Sam wasn't so sure and her look told him so. Jake ignored it and her. She tried to snuggle into his arms.

"I'm really tired," Jake told her, stunning Sam. Jake had never turned her away before.

"Are you feeling all right?" Sam wondered.

"Fine," Jake turned on his side, facing away from her.

Inside he was cold and afraid. Would she leave him if he asked her not to go to New York or not to apply for the Darton newspaper job? He wasn't sure where this fear was coming from. He just knew he was afraid.

Sam tuned on her side, her back towards Jake. She had no idea what was going on with him. She was terribly excited about winning this award and he was acting like he was put upon or she had done something to him. Was it too much to ask for him to be excited with her and for her? Apparently so.

Sam wiped a tear with the sheet before finally falling asleep.

Jake was gone when Sam woke up the next morning. She had automatically reached for him only to come in contact with nothing but sheets and pillows.

She opened her eyes to stare at his empty spot in their bed before checking the time. It was earlier than they normally got up. He must have gotten up early to specifically miss having to see her or talk to her. Or make love to her.

This morning he had left her without a word or even a kiss. Sam was hurt. And mad. Here she had achieved the most important prize in her field and he didn't want to celebrate it with her.

If the tables were turned, she'd be happy for him. No, she'd be excited and happy. Ecstatic for him. Why? Because she loved him and that's what people who loved you did.

Well the heck with him! Sam scrambled out of bed and picked her phone up, dialing Jen. She knew Jen would be happy for her.

"Hey," Jen answered the phone, sounding a bit sleepy.

"Did I wake you?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, but it's time I got up," Jen yawned. "Why are you up so early?"

"I have news," Sam's excitement came through her voice.

"Are you pregnant?" Jen yelped.

"No," Sam responded. "Why is that everyone's first guess?"

"Maybe because you and Jake go at it all the time?" Jen laughed.

"We do not," Sam scoffed. "I went without last night."

"Uh oh," Jen murmured. "Trouble in paradise?"

"I don't think so," Sam said.

"You don't _think_ so?" Jen yelped.

"Not my fault, anyway," Sam went on. "Anyway, that's not my news."

"What's your news?" Jen asked.

"I won the Pulitzer," Sam murmured, nonchalant.

"You won the Pulitzer?" Jen screamed. "You actually won?"

"Yes!" Sam screamed back at her friend. At least her _friend_ was reacting appropriately, unlike her husband.

"Oh my gosh, Sam!" Jen screamed. "Congratulations!"

"Thanks," Sam was smiling.

"That's a big deal," Jen said.

"Yeah," Sam nodded. _To everyone except Jake. _"I have to go to New York and accept it."

"You and Jake going?" Jen wondered.

"Prolly just me," Sam told her.

"Somehow I can't see Ely in NYC," Jen laughed.

"No," Sam shook her head. "He doesn't really seem to care about the award."

"He's an idiot," Jen snapped. "I'll be excited enough for you."

"Thanks Jen," Sam shook off her bad mood to smile.

"What are friends for?" Jen laughed.

"Bestest friend," Sam responded.

"Of course," Jen agreed.

"I wish you could go with me," Sam sighed.

"We'd have fun," Jen laughed.

"Yeah, we would," Sam said. "You'll be back at school though."

"It will be strange to be there alone," Jen replied. "Eric's graduated, you're married. It will be just little old me there for the next two years."

"Maybe I'll come and visit," Sam suggested.

"That would be great," Jen told her. "I'd love for you to come up."

"Should I wear my medallion?" Sam teased.

"Oh sure," Jen laughed with her friend. "That would be quite the ice breaker at parties."

"I don't do parties," Sam shivered.

"I'm sorry," Jen was quick to apologize. "Creep's serving twenty five years."

"There are more out there just like him," Sam reminded her. "I was appalled when I was doing the story and doing the research. I had no idea."

"No, me either," Jen murmured. "It really opened my eyes. I think it opened a lot of women's eyes."

"I hope so," Sam sighed. "I'd hate for what happened to me to happen to anyone else."

"No," Jen sighed too. "At least now you and Jake are back together and happy."

"Yeah," Sam murmured. She wasn't sure just how happy they were right now. _Something_ was bugging her husband and he wasn't telling her what.


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter 27**

As the time got closer for Sam to go to New York, she and Jake seemed to grow further apart. She tried to get him to talk to her, but when she tried he gave her one word answers and Sam got frustrated. Finally she just gave up trying.

They still slept in the same bed, but rarely made love to each other. It seemed they only did when they couldn't stand their urges any longer. Sam missed the intimacy and it wasn't what she signed up for when she got married.

Jake wasn't sure what was going on. He had been disappointed and hurt that she seemed so happy she wasn't pregnant and it had snowballed from there. He wasn't sure how to fix it.

Their love making was wooden and without feeling. It was over quickly and neither told the other that they loved them or tried to cuddle afterwards. Both of them would turn away, turning their back to their spouse, and go to sleep.

Sam never went out with Jake or his brothers when they did their ranch work either. It was too much trouble and work to try and put on a happy face for that amount of time.

She spent a lot of time with the other wives and their children. Debi and Quinn had welcomed a new little son which they named Dakota.

Vanis and Nate had a little girl they named Darby. To Sam, she looked just like Nate and already had his wonderful smile.

They heard that Cricket had given birth to a girl. Keeping with the L name that they had used for Lucas, Kit and Cricket had named their girl Lindsay.

Adam's wife Sherri had a baby boy which they had named Sean.

Bryan and Cara also had a baby boy. They named him Matthew.

Maxine was thrilled with all her grandbabies.

Sam felt the eyes of the family on her. She felt they all were wondering when she would have a baby also. She was beginning to think it wasn't going to happen.

She hadn't been using birth control in years and Jake wasn't using condoms when they made love to each other. Maybe she couldn't have children. Maybe the doctors had been wrong and she had picked up some type of disease from Creep when he had raped her.

These thoughts made Sam wonder if Jake would divorce her if she couldn't have his children. It was irrational, but she knew how much Jake wanted children.

He was so good with his nieces and nephews, it made Sam's heart ache to watch him. She would love to have his babies, but she didn't know what else to do.

They made love so infrequently anymore. Actually, she wondered if she could still call it _making love_. Did he still love her? He never told her he did. She didn't want to tell him that she loved him, if he didn't love her anymore. She was too afraid of the hurt.

Sam felt the depression starting in her again. She started eating less, everything tasting like sawdust to her. She just wasn't hungry and told Maxine so when her mother-in-law tried to get her to eat more.

Maxine saw the dullness in both Jake's and Sam's eyes. The happiness with each other which had been obvious, was gone. Jake looked confused, Maxine thought. When she tried talking to him, he blew her off. He didn't want to talk about it.

Jake couldn't talk about it. Talking had never been one of his strengths. He wasn't sure what was going on between him and Sam. One minute they had been happy in love. The next, their relationship was strained.

All Jake could remember was the quick denial of Sam when Maxine had asked her if her news was that she was pregnant. It had cut Jake deeply. It had made him think that maybe Sam didn't want his children. Maybe her career was more important to her now that she had won this Pulitzer.

He ached for her and what they had had. Being together now was forced. It was for pleasure only, not for love. It relieved the stress and the need, but that was all. The emotion, the _love_ wasn't there.

Jake wanted children. He loved his nieces and nephews and he had thought that Sam had wanted his children. Now he wasn't so sure.

He could see her losing weight. She wasn't eating much. Even he had noticed without his mother trying to tell him so. He just wasn't sure what to do about it.


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter 28**

Sam was packing the last of her things for her trip to New York City. She had told Jake she'd be gone for a week. Jake wasn't sure it wouldn't be longer than that. Like forever.

For some reason, he didn't expect her to come back.

Now he watched her as she put the last of her things in her suitcase. She kept glancing over her shoulder at him as he sat on the edge of the bed. Sam couldn't figure out the expression on his face.

"You want to come with me?" she asked him.

"No," he shook his head.

Sam knew he would never be comfortable in New York City. She wasn't sure _she_ would be comfortable there and she had lived in San Francisco.

"Okay," Sam shrugged turning back to what she was doing. She zipped up the suitcase and turned to face him.

She noticed his expression was blanked out and it made her angry. He couldn't show her what he was thinking since she was leaving today? Was it too much to ask?

Jake saw the flash of anger in her eyes. Good! Now she knew how he felt. He decided he was angry. Angry that she was leaving him. He knew he sounded like a little boy, but he didn't want her to leave him. He wanted to be enough for her. It stung him that he wasn't.

Sam sighed.

"I guess I'll go then," she started to turn from him.

Suddenly Jake almost leapt off the bed, grabbing her by the arm and turning her towards him. Her eyes widened and her mouth opened in surprise. He grabbed her by her thick auburn hair and pulled her to him, his mouth crushing hers. Sam tried to push him away, but he was stronger and angrier than she was. Her lips would be bruised by the time he was done with her, but at that moment Jake didn't care.

Sam fought him for a few moments, then she whimpered in need.

Suddenly, they were both stripping out of their clothes before coming back together. Jake picked her up and took her to the bed where he threw her down.

Afterwards, they stared angrily at each other as they lay there. This was in no way make up sex. This had been angry sex and both of them knew it.

"Take that with you," Jake growled.

"I don't have much choice, do I?" Sam growled right back. "Big deal, you've proven you're stronger than me."

Jake felt as if he had been slapped. Sam saw it on his face and was instantly sorry she had uttered those words. She had practically accused him of taking her against her will.

With an oath, Jake stepped away from her, out of her. He looked at her for a moment before he started putting his clothes back on.

Sam watched him as he dressed, laying on the bed that they shared. Would they still share it when she came back?

With a final glance, Jake looked her over. He wanted nothing more than to beg her not to leave him. But he didn't.

He left the room, leaving his wife to look after him as he did.

Sam felt lost in New York City. She had known it was big, but it dwarfed her. It was nothing like San Francisco and she wished she hadn't come.

She hadn't heard from Jake since she had left Nevada a week ago, but she really hadn't expected to. They hadn't parted on the best terms. She missed him. She loved him.

Sam had thought a lot on the flight to New York. She still had no idea why they were fighting. Or rather, they weren't fighting. Fighting meant talking and being involved with each other. They weren't involved.

Their coupling before she left had been the most emotion that Jake had showed her in awhile. Most of the time he was blank. His eyes were blanked out when she looked at him. His face was blanked out. He gave away nothing, when she wanted more.

Sam was too proud to beg him. Either he'd tell her what was going on with him, between the two of them, or he wouldn't.

She missed their closeness. She missed the teasing, the being together body and soul. Just being together bodily wasn't cutting it for her. She felt used and cheapened. She cursed her body for wanting him so badly that she compromised herself for it.

Sam was saddened by her thoughts. Since when had being with Jake become a compromise for her? She sat in her room at the hotel and cried.

Oh gosh, now she was becoming emotional. Just what she needed when she was accepting her Pulitzer tonight. She tried wiping her eyes only to start sobbing.

She was supposed to be happy. She had reached the pinnacle of her career as a photo journalist or rather a _journalist_, and she was sitting in a hotel room feeling sorry for herself. How messed up was that?

Sam flung herself face down on the bed, hugging a pillow to her and just sobbed. She wasn't sure why she was sobbing, she just felt like she needed to. Nothing she told herself to make her stop actually worked.

She sobbed until she had nothing left. She was drained. She was so tired, but was afraid to take a nap, not sure she'd wake up in time to go to the award ceremony.

Why was she so tired? She had been getting enough sleep. Yet she was exhausted. Maybe it was the nerves. Maybe it was all the drama she was going through with Jake.

She loved Jake. She started sobbing again. She missed her husband. Should she call him? Would that be giving in to him?

Sam swore under her breath. How would she be giving in to him by calling him? They were married. Weren't they? Could Jake be filing for divorce while she was gone?

That thought made her howl out her sorrow and her fear. My gosh, what was wrong with her? This felt similar to how she felt after she had woken up in Creep's bed and Jake had broken up with her.

Sam flipped her pillow over when the one side became sodden. She never cried this much. Or at least she hadn't since Jake and she had gotten together again.

She decided to call Jake, taking out her phone and dialing his number. Sam cried hearing his voice on his voice mail. She had missed him more than she had realized. What a fool she had been. She tried to leave him a message, but she knew she was incoherent and he wouldn't be able to understand her. Sam hoped he at least understood how much she loved him.

Sam got up from the bed and decided to start getting ready for the award dinner. She wished that Jake was here with her. It would mean more to her if he would be happy with her and for her. Not having his approval cut her deeply.

She stood in the shower, crying again, letting the water take her tears down the drain.


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter 29**

Jake was miserable. He missed his wife. He had been missing her for awhile and not just since she had left for New York City.

He had treated her badly, he thought. Why couldn't he be happy that she had been recognized?

He knew why. He was afraid she would leave him for the bright lights and news stories out in the big city. How could he compete with the breaking news and the rush he knew she experienced when she was chasing it. He couldn't.

Jake was a rancher. Pure and simple. He'd never be anything more than a rancher. Sam had known that from the time they were little kids. It was the only thing he had ever wanted to be.

He dabbled in tracking. He knew he was one of the best trackers in the state, but he still wanted to be a rancher more than he wanted to be known as a good tracker.

Jake also wanted to be Sam's husband. Thankfully, Dawn had called it off. He was meant to be with Sam. So why had her success threatened him so much?

He had known she was a journalist when they had met up again in Hawaii after Dawn had called off the wedding. Why was her winning a prize so damn hard for him?

Maybe he was jealous. Maybe it was because she had achieved this without him, proving she could survive without him if she tried.

"Hey Jake?" Nate's voice brought Jake out of his reverie.

Jake lifted his head towards his brother who was pointing towards the mountains.

Jake followed his brother's pointing hand and saw the Phantom watching them from a ridge. Great! The horse that hated him was now watching him.

The Phantom had always hated him, Jake felt. Even when he was Sam's beloved colt Blackie, the horse had left no doubt that he didn't like Jake. He had tried nipping and biting him on a number of occasions.

Sam didn't think the horse disliked Jake. Jake knew better. He and Mac had discussed it and they both thought it was jealousy on the Phantom's part. He considered Sam _his_ and didn't like that Jake also felt that way about her.

"She's mine you bugger," Jake growled under his breath, surprising Nate.

Jake brought himself up short. Sam was _his_. He had married her. He loved her. No, it was more than just mere love. He adored her.

So what she had won this award. She still belonged to him. Didn't she?

He was concerned she would become so caught up in the journalistic life again that she wouldn't want to come home.

"Jake," Quinn got his attention. He lifted his eyes to see all three of his brothers watching him. "I'm not sure what's going on between the two of you, but she loves you."

Nate nodded.

"It's obvious to us, at least," Bryan added. "She's always loved you."

"Even when we were all kids," Nate said.

Jake gave a deep longsuffering sigh.

"I know," he murmured.

"Then what's the trouble?" Quinn wondered.

What _was_ the trouble? She hadn't told him she wasn't coming home.

Jake's eyes slid to Quinn's and Quinn saw the frightened little boy within. It wasn't the heart wrenching grief from before, but there was real fear there.

"You don't think she's coming back," Quinn said.

"What?" Nate yelped. Bramble shied under him. Nate got control of his horse before looking at Jake again.

"What makes you think that, Jakey?" Bryan asked.

"I don't know," Jake admitted. "She admitted to Jen that she was going to apply at the paper."

"Which paper?" Quinn asked.

"I assumed Darton's, but I don't know for sure," Jake rubbed the back of his neck.

"Is that so bad?" Nate wondered. Vanis still worked part time as a nurse and he certainly didn't mind. The kids might mind, but she was attentive to them and to him.

"You're being selfish, little man," Quinn told him.

Jake's head rose until he was glaring into Quinn's eyes.

"You can stop the glaring stuff too," Quinn laughed. "It doesn't work with me and never has."

Jake's eyes narrowed at the youngest twin.

"Have you called her, Jakey?" Nate asked, breaking the tension between the two brothers.

"No," Jake shook his head. "If she wants to talk to me, she knows where I am."

Nate met the eyes of Quinn and Bryan, the three of them shaking their heads at their youngest brother.

"She's a woman, Jake," Bryan reminded him. "They don't cave first."

"If they did, it would save our manhood," Nate laughed.

"Instead, they tell us with one look that they own us," Quinn laughed with his brother.

"And yet, we keep going back for more," Bryan put in with a laugh.

"Of course," Nate responded.

Jake couldn't help the twitch of his mouth as his brothers all laughed hysterically.

"My gosh, we're all henpecked," Bryan choked out.

"Whipped," Quinn, Nate and Jake said together.


	30. Chapter 30

**Chapter 30**

Jake listened to Sam's voice mail but couldn't make out a word through her sobs. Was she all right? He tried calling her back, but it went straight to her voice mail. He didn't leave a message.

He looked at a clock, doing the time difference in his head and realized that she was at the award ceremony picking up her Pulitzer. He _was_ proud of her. She had forgotten her own pain at being date raped and written a compelling story to bring the problem out of the shadows.

His wife was gutsy, and he loved his wife. Jake vowed to work through whatever it was that had made them drift apart. He didn't want to be drifted apart from Sam. They had been through so much together and to be together, he didn't want to see it ruined.

He decided to go see his grandfather. Mac had an uncanny ability to calm Jake when he was frazzled. Jake didn't get this way very often, but Mac had always calmed him down. Now Jake needed assurance that his wife would be coming back to him.

"Jacob," Mac smiled when he answered Jake's knock. It almost seemed as Mac had been expecting him. "Come in."

Jake went into Mac's house and stood there, unsure of himself. He wasn't sure what to say. He was almost ashamed of what had happened between Sam and him.

"Something to drink?" Mac asked.

"A beer?" Jake murmured.

Mac gave him a nod and went to the kitchen, grabbing two bottles. He came back, noticing that Jake hadn't moved. Mac handed him one of the bottles. Mac indicated the couch and Jake sat down on it, taking a drag from his bottle.

"Something is bothering you, Jake," Mac said.

"She's in New York," Jake told him.

"For the Pulitzer," Mac nodded. "You must be very proud of her."

"I am," Jake sighed, taking another long drink of beer.

"Does she know you are?" Mac asked.

"No," Jake shook his head, his eyes flicking to those eyes which were so much like his own.

"She loves you and will come back," Mac got to the point.

Jake stared at his grandfather. "She will?"

"You will not return to the darkness, Jake," Mac assured him.

Jake sighed again, glancing at Mac. That's when he noticed the look he received from his grandfather.

"What is it?" Jake asked.

"She will not be coming back alone," Mac informed his grandson.

Jake had been about to take another drink from his bottle, but stopped.

"She's bringing someone back with her?" Jake was surprised. "Who?"

"Someone you will want to meet," Mac smiled what could only be described as a sly smile.

Jake was lost. He knew there was no way Mac was going to tell him either.

Sam was sitting at the table with the rest of the group from the _Chronicle_ when she felt overwhelmed with emotion. _Gosh, what was going on that she wanted to cry at the drop of a hat?_

The longer she sat there, the harder it was not to cry. She saw Johnny giving her strange looks as she wiped her eyes.

"Are you all right, Sam?" Johnny asked.

"Yes," Sam nodded.

Just before she was going to go up and accept her award, she felt her stomach churning. Sam was afraid she was going to be sick. Oh terrific, the fish had to have been bad though nobody else looked like they were having problems.

"You look green," Johnny said to her.

"Bad fish," Sam gulped, trying to keep the vomit inside of her.

"I had the fish and I feel okay," Johnny informed her.

"Oh," Sam was surprised. She swallowed loudly, just as her name was announced. She placed her hand over her mouth and stood up, trying not to rush like she wanted to do.

_Oh please don't let me vomit_, Sam silently begged whoever might be listening. She didn't know why her stomach was acting up so badly.

Someone helped Sam up on the stage. She tried smiling, but gritted her teeth to keep from gagging.

Oh gosh, was she expected to talk? Sam was afraid if she opened her mouth she would throw up. She swallowed again, noisily enough that everyone heard it through the microphone open on the stage.

"Thank you," she rushed out before setting her teeth again to keep whatever was in her stomach from coming up.

A man handed her the medallion and check and Sam felt like jumping off the stage and running for the nearest bathroom. Instead, she picked her way down the stairs as the next name was announced.

Once the attention was off of her and on the next person receiving their award, Sam took off for the doors. She hurried as quickly as she could in her shoes and barely made it into a stall before she lost her meal.

Sam groaned as her stomach continued to churn. She retched a couple of times until her stomach was empty. She knew it would be a long time before she would be able to eat fish again without thinking of this. Just the smell of fish would prolly turn her off for awhile.

Suddenly Sam stilled. Wait a second! She tried counting back in her head, but she sucked at math. Was she late for her period? She had brought tampons, because she had been due while she was in New York but her period had never come.

She had completely forgotten about it until now.

Oh my gosh! Could she be pregnant? Finally pregnant?

Even though she and Jake hadn't been making love, they'd still had coupled. That's all it would take since neither of them had been using any form of birth control.

Just the idea of it made Sam giddy. She giggled, putting a hand over her mouth. Then she retched again before giggling some more.

She hadn't felt this giddy since Jake had kissed her, really kissed her like a man kissed a woman, all those years before. Gosh, had it been six years?

Sam stood up and hugged herself, letting out another giggle. Oh she couldn't wait to get home now and tell Jake!

Oh wait, she needed to be sure, didn't she, before she told him?

Heck no! Jake would want to know even before it was official.

She started to cry again, loving him and being sorry for all the trouble she had caused him recently. Hopefully he still loved her. Did he still love her?

Once the crying ended, Sam left the stall and looked at herself in the mirror. She stuck her tongue out at her reflection glad that Jake couldn't see her now. She was a mess.

She took a dampened paper towel and dabbed at her eyes, trying to keep the mascara from smearing any more than it already had.

All she wanted to do now was go home, back to Jake. She wanted to wrap her arms around his neck, apologize for her part in what had happened between them and have his strong arms come around her and hold her tight.

She checked her watch. If she hurried, she might be able to catch a red-eye out of Kennedy airport and be home by morning.

Sam clutched her medallion and her check and quickly left the ladies restroom. Johnny was outside looking worried.

"Are you okay, Sam?" he asked.

"Perfect," Sam's smile was brilliant in her face. "I'm going home."

"Now?" Johnny squawked.

"Now," Sam gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek. "Thank you for everything, but I need to go home."

"Take care of yourself, Sam," Johnny told her. "You know you'll always have a job with me."

"Yes, I know," Sam nodded and then she was gone.

© 2009 – LB

Characters © Terri Farley


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